IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Complain to the Mayor about a dangerous road in your neighbourhood.

#mayor #road #neighbourhood
Dear Mayor, I am contacting you because of the bad condition of the roads in my
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
show examples
.
This
road
 is becoming more and more dangerous for drivers and pedestrians and I believe immediate action is needed to address
this
 situation.I believe that you will solve
this
problem
 positively and
that is
 why I am contacting you. The main
problem
 is the poor condition of the
road
 surface. Potholes and cracks on the
road
 cause many accidents. Apart from the condition of the
road
, the poor street lighting and the lack of
road
 signs are causing many problems. Especially at night, the ability to see is greatly reduced and it is very dangerous for young children and the elderly. To solve
this
problem
, I propose to allocate the necessary amount of money from the district budget and
then
 repair the
road
 and
road
 lights. I hope you will pay attention to
this
problem
 and solve it positively.
King
Correct your spelling
Kind
show examples
 regards, Khurshidbek Umedov
Submitted by Teo Halimov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

general
Improve the clarity by organizing your sentences and adding a little more detail to illustrate the points. For instance, explain specific incidents caused by the dangerous road or cite complaints from other residents, if possible.
coherence cohesion
Consider breaking the content into more paragraphs. One paragraph can address the road condition, another can tackle the street lighting and signage issues, and a concluding paragraph can summarize your request and reiterate the call to action.
general
Ensure proper greetings and ending salutations, such as 'Best regards,' instead of 'King regards'.
task response
The letter clearly identifies the problem and proposes a solution, which shows good task achievement.
coherence
The ideas are clearly presented and logically structured, making it easy to follow.
general
The language used is polite and formal, which is appropriate for a letter to the mayor.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: