The responsibility of preventing and reducing global environmental damage lies in the hands of politicians and individuals have little impact. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

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Both
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politicians and
individuals
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are responsible for protecting the
environment
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and curbing damages.
While
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some argue that politicians and mankind make no difference in constructing a friendly-
environment
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, I totally disagree with
this
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stance and assert that
both
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governments and
individuals
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contribute largely to preserving the
environment
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. Incorrectly seeing short-term profits and results, proponents of politicians and persons having tiny contributions are short-sighted. Doubtless, repairing an ecosystem that has been destroyed is a perennial process, so humans need to have enough patience to implement actions step by step.
This
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way, effective results will sooner appear. Huge impacts are made by officeholders.
Firstly
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, large infrastructural changes needed for significant environmental impact can mostly be overseen and funded by governments.
For example
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, research on finding alternative sources of fresh
water
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is urgent since the grave
water
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scarcity.
Both
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glacial
water
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and desalinated slat
water
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hold huge potential as vast sources of
water
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,
however
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, these techniques are too expensive to allocate, so only official institutions and wealthy men can afford them.
Moreover
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, governments can release reasonable policies and regulations, constraining actions that
instill
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instil
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large contamination to the
environment
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and offering incentives to ecosystem-friendly shops like reducing taxation.
Individuals
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also
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contribute to constructing the
environment
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.
Firstly
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, uninformed or misinformed about the baneful influence that
individuals
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’ daily activities injury the ecosystem is the culprit of environmental problems. Individual actions
such
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as reusing or rejecting plastic packing items, shutting down taps quickly and conserving fossil fuels accumulate together and make a significant difference.
Furthermore
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, education and personal responsibility towards the
environment
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can foster a culture of sustainability among the populace.
For instance
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, in China, there are ubiquitous banners saying, green mountains and clear
water
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are gold mountains and pupils in schools are required to recite methods about protecting the
environment
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. In conclusion, not only officeholders but
individuals
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are responsible for being conservationists.
Although
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the result only can be seen in the long-term, they
both
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produce huge contributions from past to present.
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coherence
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task achievement
Include more specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments and provide more concrete support.
task achievement
Revise certain segments for grammatical accuracy and to ensure clarity in expression. Pay attention to word choice and sentence construction to avoid minor errors.
coherence
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frames the argument.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant examples in discussing the roles of both politicians and individuals in environmental conservation.
coherence
The paragraphs are logically structured, and there is a good flow of ideas from one to the next.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental regulations
  • grassroots movements
  • corporate accountability
  • industrial pollution
  • infrastructural changes
  • sustainable practices
  • global cooperation
  • transboundary issues
  • public awareness
  • cumulative impact
  • conserving energy
  • reducing waste
  • significant difference
  • political entities
  • foster a culture of sustainability
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