Zoos are sometimes seen as necessary but poor alternatives to a natural environment. Discuss some of the arguments for and against keeping animals in zoos as an IELTS topic and give your own opinion.
The rise of endangered
animals
has prompted plenty of conservative actions; however
, this
has sparked some controversy in zoos
, as they tend to be seen as necessary but poor alternatives to the natural environment, Hence
, in this
essay I will discuss some arguments and opinions regarding this
issue.
Firstly
, most people
will find zoos
as poor alternatives to a natural habitat as they usually do not meet the required environment for wild animals
to live in the wild. For example
, a zoo has an enclosure for tigers, which because of the limited space, does not provide them the opportunity to hunt as they do in the wild. Moreover
, some people
might find the enclosures to be quite harmful to these animals
, as being confined in a small space might lead to them lashing out in frustration from psychological and physical deprivation.
On the other hand
, zoos
have some benefits for the animals
. Since the animals
are kept in enclosures, they will be constantly monitored. Thus
, if something were to happen to them; for instance
, falling ill or getting hurt, specialized authorities are to quickly take action. Additionally
, zoos
offer people
a chance to see and learn more about these animals
. As zoos
try to create a replica of their natural environment, people
will be able to know the importance of conservation efforts and contribute to them through donations.
To conclude
, zoos
can be seen as a poor substitute for a natural habitat; however
, zoos
do provide the animals
with detailed care which increases the chances of their survival. It also
provides people
with information regarding endangered animals
and how important it is to contribute to conservative measures.Submitted by riani.the2 on
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task achievement
Your essay would benefit from more specific examples and evidence supporting the points made. For instance, mentioning specific zoos with conservation success stories or detailing specific instances of animals suffering from captivity would strengthen your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Try to avoid minor grammatical and spelling errors. For example, instead of "plenty of conservative actions," it would be more appropriate to use "conservation actions."
coherence and cohesion
It would be helpful to use more transitional phrases to ensure an even smoother flow between ideas. For instance, using words such as 'Additionally' and 'Furthermore' can help the reader follow your argument more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This makes it easy to follow your main points and arguments.
task achievement
You have included both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced approach to discussing the topic. This helps in providing a thorough response to the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a clear personal opinion, which ties the essay together well.