In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

#countries #people #work #travel #year #school #university

In recent years, some

people

have been discussing whether the benefits of sharing a house with others overshadow the drawbacks or not, with

people

believing the downsides outweigh the benefits. In

this

essay, I will debate and explain my opinion about

this

topic. On the one hand, there are some problems in living with others for two reasons.

Firstly

, those who use the same house need to respect their personal lifestyle, which gets slightly stressed by each other.

Additionally

, living with friends makes it difficult to spend personal time, which might not focus solely on their tasks and situations.

Furthermore

, they should control the time that use

bathroom

Add an article

the bathroom

show examples

or even take showers.

For example

, many

people

who live with

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

folk have experienced a lot of inconvenient situations

due to

these reasons.

On the other hand

, sharing housing with

people

exerts a positive effect on the budget.

Firstly

, they can save money because they pay together for electronic fees and water tax.

Secondly

, when one has some issues or bad emotions they are able to express their emotion and share their difficult things in various fields, which can resolve significant stress.

For instance

according to

a recent survey, living with friends is beneficial to get less stress. In my opinion,

while

it is undeniable that some

people

are exposed to some negative influences through sharing housing, I firmly believe that living with others helps their health.

Submitted by garim4645 on Thu Jul 18 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that all main points are fully developed with sufficient detail and depth. The essay should tackle both advantages and disadvantages equally for a balanced response.

coherence cohesion

Try to use more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to express your ideas, as this can make your essay more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of proficiency in English.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your paragraphs have clear and logical transitions. Each paragraph should follow naturally from the one before, making the essay more coherent overall.

coherence cohesion

The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy to follow the writer's main argument.

task achievement

The examples used are relevant and help to illustrate the points being made, which strengthens the argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

236 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Social networking sites are beneficial on an individual level, but for a community as a whole, it does have a negative impact. Give your opinion.

some people think that schools should focus on academic subjects like algebra, history, and physics, but others think that schools should spent time focusing on practical skills like time management and banking. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many cities today, most people live in large apartment blocks. Does this kind of accommodation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that public buildings should be moved out ò the city to promote citizen's well-being and better economic growing, while some argue that the planning will cause more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.