IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, more money is spent on transport system in the cities. In contrast, very little is spent in rural areas.What are the effect of this and What can be done to solve this problem.

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These days,a considerable amount of
money
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
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 being spent on public
transportation
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
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 in mega
cities
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.
However
Linking Words
,the
government
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 do not prefer to allocate
budget
Correct article usage
a budget
show examples
 to improve
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transportation
Add an article
the transportation
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system
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 in
suburbs
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 very much.
This
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 essay will look at some problems of
this
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 action which is created in society and
also
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 I will propose some effective solutions. Let's begin by looking at some difficulties which are produced by spending less
money
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 on rural regions.
Firstly
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,If the
government
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 do not invest
money
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for
Change preposition
in
show examples
transportation
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 in
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suburbs
Correct article usage
the suburbs
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,the
populations
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population
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 will face many problems
for
Change preposition
with
show examples
 moving
in
Change preposition
to
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 other places.Take crowded
cities
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,as an example.
In other words
Linking Words
,the majority of
people
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 may not be able to move
in
Change preposition
to
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 other
areas
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 with public
transportation
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 in villages as simple as the communities who live in urban
areas
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.
Secondly
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,a significant number of
people
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 might not be interested in staying in rural
areas
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due to
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 the lack of accessibility to better public
transportation
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.
That is
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 to say,the communities may tend to migrate
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 central regions so that they can utilize better
transportation
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
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 and
also
Linking Words
 the rate of population in these places would decline dramatically. Turning to the side of the solutions,to tackle
this
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 issue the
government
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 should bring in laws in order to improve
public
Correct article usage
the public
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transportation
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system
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 with more amount of expenditure.If the
government
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 attend to
suburbs
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 as much as crowded
cities
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 and
also
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allocate
Correct subject-verb agreement
allocates
show examples
 a substantial amount of budget,
people
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 will feel more satisfied.Clearly,not only can
people
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 transport in other
cities
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 with some public vehicles
such
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 as buses,but
also
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 the populations of these rural
areas
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 do not decrease and they remain in their local regions.
To conclude
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,the
government
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 might spend more
money
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 on
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transportation
Add an article
the transportation
show examples
system
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 in downtown
rahter
Correct your spelling
rather
 than
suburbs
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 in the most countries.
However
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,
this
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 decision may cause a lot of various problems for both society and
people
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.
As a result
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,
this
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 issue will remain unchanged unless the
government
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 allocate more budget in some rural
areas
Use synonyms
.

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introduction conclusion present
Your essay includes a good introduction and conclusion. However, try to ensure that your conclusion summarizes the main points discussed in the essay more explicitly.
relevant specific examples
Providing more specific examples can make your essay stronger. Use case studies, statistics, or real-world scenarios to support your main points.
clear comprehensive ideas
Focus on avoiding minor grammatical errors. For example, “a considerable amount of money are” should be “a considerable amount of money is”. Proofreading can help with this.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph smoothly transitions into the next. Use linking phrases such as ‘Additionally’, ‘Moreover’, or ‘Furthermore’ to enhance cohesion.
complete response
Your essay responds completely to the task. You have addressed both the effects and solutions clearly.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have presented clear and comprehensive ideas. Your points are well-organized and easy to understand.
logical structure
Your essay is logically structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which enhances readability.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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