In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount that people can earn. Discuss both views and give your option.

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In certain parts of the world, individuals may have an immensely high wage. Proponents of
this
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viewpoint argue that it benefits the nation,
while
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others believe that the amount people receive from their paychecks must be limited by the authority. In my opinion,
this
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approach should not be taken since it can restrict the nation from excelling in economics, and doing the opposite can greatly benefit the community.
To begin
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with, one argument among those supporting the strategy is that it can minimize the wealth gap in society.
In other words
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, there is no significant difference in the amount of money received among people, and their wealth follows the same pattern.
However
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, I think that
this
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is not an effective policy
due to
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the fact that nowadays, numerous states are racing to increase their general income, and
this
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strategy is expected to inhibit revenue growth as the restriction will not add an abundance of market exchanges. Alternatively, the higher pay of the residents can boost economic growth.
This
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is
due to
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the fact that the high-income group has greater buying power than others;
thus
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, they can buy expensive products, which contributes to major value trades. If the transaction volume in the market rises,
then
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the general domestic product (GDP), which is a financial marker to show national revenues, is expected to follow the same trend.
For instance
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, the average earnings in Singapore are around 10,000 dollars, with certain professionals receiving more than 100,000 dollars. In comparison, employers in Indonesia merely get a quarter of these numbers, and
consequently
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, Singapore has a four-times higher GDP than Indonesia.
This
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is unlikely to happen if the government limits their citizens' salaries, and they can utilize
this
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benefit to enhance public services
such
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as hospitals, schools, and civil transportation. In conclusion,
although
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restricting personal paychecks can reduce the gap between the rich and the impoverished, I believe that doing the opposite can contribute to a nation's prosperity and have a significant beneficial outcome for their community.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
To improve task response, ensure that your essay addresses all aspects of the prompt fully. While your essay provides a clear position and supports it with examples, further development of counterarguments could provide a more balanced discussion. Try to explore alternative viewpoints more thoroughly before stating your conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Regarding coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear structure with logical progression of ideas. However, transitioning between paragraphs and ideas could be smoother. Use a wider range of cohesive devices and topic sentences to better guide your reader through your argument. This will enhance the overall readability of your essay.
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