The chart below shows the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The two pie
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chart
Fix the agreement mistake
charts
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depict the causes why
people
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are going to
work
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by bicycle or car.
Overall
Linking Words
, in the first
chart
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, 60 per
cent
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of
people
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choose to use
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
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because of health and fitness and less
polution
Correct your spelling
pollution
. The rest are other reasons.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
second
chart
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,
people
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prefer
Add the particle
prefer to
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use private cars because they feel
comfort
Replace the word
comfortable
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, at least 40 per
cent
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. The reasons for cycling to
work
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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dominated by health and fitness and less
polution
Correct your spelling
pollution
with the same
percentage
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, which is 30 per
cent
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, respectively. Another reason is there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
no parking problems and the
percentage
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is 15 per
cent
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. The cause
like
Change preposition
of
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no costs
also
Linking Words
become
Wrong verb form
became
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concern
Correct article usage
a concern
show examples
and got 13 per
cent
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. The
last
Linking Words
reason is faster than driving with the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
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percentage
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at 12 per
cent
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.
Move
Wrong verb form
Moving
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to
Correct article usage
the other
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other
Change the wording
another chart
other charts
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chart
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, 40 per
cent
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of
people
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are enjoy
Change the verb form
are enjoying
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driving to
work
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due to
Linking Words
the
Change the word
their
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comfortness
Correct your spelling
comforts
.
Then
Linking Words
, 21 per
cent
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is because the distance
of
Change preposition
between
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the office and their home
too
Add a missing verb
is too
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far. Faster than cycling and need to carry things in
work
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got
same
Change the article
the same
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percentage
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about 14 per
cent
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.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
people
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think that driving is more safe than cycling and
this
Linking Words
reason got 11 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, people, work, cent, percentage with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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