IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#people #travel #work #bicycle #car #summaries #information #features #comparisons
The two pie
chart
Fix the agreement mistake
charts
show examples
 depict the causes why
people
 are going to
work
 by bicycle or car.
Overall
, in the first
chart
, 60 per
cent
 of
people
 choose to use
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
 because of health and fitness and less
polution
Correct your spelling
pollution
. The rest are other reasons.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
 second
chart
,
people
prefer
Add the particle
prefer to
show examples
 use private cars because they feel
comfort
Replace the word
comfortable
show examples
, at least 40 per
cent
. The reasons for cycling to
work
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 dominated by health and fitness and less
polution
Correct your spelling
pollution
 with the same
percentage
, which is 30 per
cent
, respectively. Another reason is there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 no parking problems and the
percentage
 is 15 per
cent
. The cause
like
Change preposition
of
show examples
 no costs
also
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
concern
Correct article usage
a concern
show examples
 and got 13 per
cent
. The
last
 reason is faster than driving with the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
percentage
 at 12 per
cent
.
Move
Wrong verb form
Moving
show examples
 to
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other
Change the wording
another chart
other charts
show examples
chart
, 40 per
cent
 of
people
are enjoy
Change the verb form
are enjoying
show examples
 driving to
work
due to
the
Change the word
their
show examples
comfortness
Correct your spelling
comforts
.
Then
, 21 per
cent
 is because the distance
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 the office and their home
too
Add a missing verb
is too
show examples
 far. Faster than cycling and need to carry things in
work
 got
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
percentage
 about 14 per
cent
.
Lastly
,
people
 think that driving is more safe than cycling and
this
 reason got 11 per
cent
.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, people, work, cent, percentage with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼

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