People in many countries are spending less time with their family. What are the reasons, and effects of this?

In the contemporary era, with the advancement and the sophistication of the developmental process,
the
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apply
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people are busier than ever.
This
has sparked a pressing issue
in
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at
show examples
the familial level, as the
members
are apart from each other
due to
their hectic
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
.
This
essay will expound
the
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on the
show examples
compelling reasons behind
this
and viable solutions
on
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to
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it will be suggested with
the
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apply
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relavant
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relevant
examples. Money has gained
a
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apply
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paramount importance recently and each individual has to chase
behind
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apply
show examples
it to seize the targets of
the
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apply
show examples
life. So, it is widely speculated that earning money is a key responsibility of the elders of a house and for that engaging in a job is
a
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apply
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compulsory. Particularly, doing extra duties,
working
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and working
show examples
on holidays are
also
within the dedications of the incomer.
This
eventually
mitigate
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mitigates
show examples
the opportunities gained by them to be with their significant others.
Although
we
spend
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have
show examples
a very tight
time
schedule, it is
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
show examples
factor to delegate sometime to be with the family.
For example
, a father who works for six days per week
,
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apply
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may receive a single leave on
sunday
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Sunday
show examples
.
Therefore
, they should consider
on
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apply
show examples
family gatherings on that day by having a tea
time
or a meal together or by having a day out.
On the other hand
, it is conspicuous that there are myriad
of
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apply
show examples
other factors that act as
deterrent
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deterrents
show examples
causing
the
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apply
show examples
interpersonal distancing. Usually, the
wide-spread
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widespread
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of
time
costing activities like over usage of social
medias
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media
show examples
, smartphones and video game gaming habits are known to be a gap which
separate
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separates
show examples
the interactions
within
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among
show examples
family
members
.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
those technologies are inevitable within a society, individuals should possess a proper understanding
about
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of
show examples
the significance of the family, rather than those devices. Eventually, the offsprings should be inculcated
the
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in the
show examples
value of the bonds.
For instance
,
a
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apply
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research done
in
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at
show examples
UK University reveals that recently the usage of social media
was
Verb problem
has
show examples
increased by 60% within the
last
decade and the majority of that was done during the home stay.
To conclude
, on the basis of the
about
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apply
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discussion I am asserting that the
time
dedicated by the family
members
on
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to
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their jobs
as well as
some activities has caused the separation of family
members
, and the mitigation of that issue can be
adressed
Correct your spelling
addressed
by planning the daily routines and
also
educating the people, about the importance of a family.
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task response
Consider improving the clarity of your main points. Sometimes, your sentences are complex and could be simplified for better understanding.
coherence and cohesion
Try to avoid minor grammatical errors and improve your use of articles and prepositions, as these can affect the readability of your essay.
task response
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, and your main points are well supported.
coherence and cohesion
You have used relevant examples to illustrate your points, which enhances your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • predominant
  • commitments
  • imbalance
  • digital technology
  • social media
  • globalization
  • weakened
  • disconnected
  • strain
  • stress
  • mental health issues
  • developmental issues
  • behavioral problems
  • parental guidance
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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