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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#information #railway #systems #six #cities #features #comparisons
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The table illustrates data about the underground
railway
Use synonyms
 systems in London, Paris, Tokyo, Washington DC, Kytoto, and LA. data categories by( date of
opened
Change the form of the verb
opening
show examples
,
kilometres
Use synonyms
 of
route
Use synonyms
 , and
passengers
Use synonyms
 per
year
Use synonyms
 in millions).
Overall
Linking Words
, Tokyo has the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
passengers
Use synonyms
 per
year
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 Los Angeles has the lowest
number
Use synonyms
. London
railway
Use synonyms
 systems have
a huge
Correct the article-noun agreement
huge kilometres
a huge kilometre
show examples
kilometres
Use synonyms
 of
route
Use synonyms
. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
contrast, Kyoto has a few
Use synonyms
route
Change to a plural noun
routes
show examples
. Tokyo
railway
Use synonyms
 system has
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 highest
number
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
passengers
Change preposition
of passengers
show examples
 per
Use synonyms
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 1927 million
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and 155
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
route
Add an article
the route
show examples
 less than Paris which has 199
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
route
Add an article
the route
show examples
 and only 1191
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
passengers
Use synonyms
 every
year
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, London transportation was the first one it opened in 1863 with a huge
Use synonyms
kilometres
Fix the agreement mistake
kilometre
show examples
394
Change preposition
of 394
show examples
, but only 775
passengers
Use synonyms
 travel
ever
Correct your spelling
every
show examples
year
Use synonyms
. Washington DC has 126 and their
passengers
Use synonyms
 144,
while
Linking Words
 Los Angeles has the
newst
Correct your spelling
newest
railway
Use synonyms
 system with 28
kilometres
Use synonyms
 and 50
travelor
Correct your spelling
travellers
.
Correct your spelling
However
Howeverm
Correct your spelling
However
 the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 of
passengers
Use synonyms
Submitted by saja.alotaibi on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words railway, kilometres, route, passengers, year, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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