In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for community. Why might be this is the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In some countries, owning a
home
rather than renting one is very important for
community
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the community
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. Why might be
this
is
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apply
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the case? Do you think
this
is a positive or negative situation? In some countries, it is more important for women to have their own housing than to rent an apartment. The apartment is the foundation on which our entire Life is built, the building in which several generations live is passed down by inheritance.
In addition
, the acquisition of real estate depends on financial capabilities, which not every person can afford. In
this
essay, I will give examples of how comfortable and
cozy
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cosy
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it is to have your own
home
. Some societies build or buy a
home
in which they furnish every corner, put their whole soul into it, and,
as a result
, huge financial costs.
Firstly
, owning a private residence is comfortable, where there is a huge space, a garden with trees, a swimming pool, and outbuildings for raising pets.
For example
, our parents'
home
with an area of 150 square meters has a huge garden with fruit trees, a greenhouse of decorative flowers, and a huge swimming pool was built by my father.
This
is our childhood
home
, where all family members gather and organize various events, cook barbecues in the shade of the garden, and the end,
this
is our family nest where warmth and comfort reign.
However
, maintaining a large
home
requires special care and repairs are not cheap.
On the other hand
, owning a
home
is important for the population in that it gives a sense of security and stability.
Moreover
, owning a
home
is a wise investment, the value of the property has the advantage of making a huge profit in the future by selling the residence.
However
, renting housing may not be predictable, since the landlord may increase the price of accommodation or sell it.
For example
, a family renting a premise has established a comfortable life, their children go to a local school and have settled into society.
However
, sudden eviction at the request of the owner, who decided to live or sell, depresses the tenant who cannot buy housing from his earnings and
for
this
reason, is forced to rent an apartment.
In contrast
, homeowners have the ability to control their situation and are not dependent on the owners. In conclusion, owning your own
home
is a financial investment in the future, a goal that many families around the world strive for, and it is a worthy goal.
Submitted by moon2014angel on

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task achievement
Your essay generally addresses the prompt and provides reasons why owning a home might be important, but it lacks a little clarity in certain sections, particularly in the introduction. Ensure that each part of your essay clearly connects to the main question asked.
coherence cohesion
Try to weave the paragraphs together more effectively. Use transition phrases and linking words to connect ideas and paragraphs, ensuring a smoother flow of information.
task achievement
Expand on your points with more specific details and examples. While you provided some examples, adding more detailed explanations can strengthen your arguments further.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.
task achievement
The points made regarding the comfort of owning a home and the challenges of renting are relevant and clearly articulated.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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