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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in other countries. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that skilled
professionals
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such
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 as doctors and engineers are in high demand across many countries. Some people believe that these individuals should be required to
work
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 in the
country
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 where they received their training,
while
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 others argue that they should be free to choose where to
work
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. In
this
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 essay, an attempt will be made to examine both perspectives. Those who support the idea that
professionals
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 should
work
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 in the
country
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 where they were trained provide some reasons to justify their view. One of the most apparent reasons is that governments often invest significant resources in education and training. To illustrate, public funding is used to support universities, scholarships, and professional development programmes.
For instance
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, if trained
professionals
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 leave the
country
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, it may result in a shortage of skilled workers and reduce the return on government investment.
In addition
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, essential services
such
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 as healthcare may suffer if there are not enough qualified
professionals
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 available. Those who disagree with the above idea
also
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 have some points that should not be overlooked. One major reason is that individuals should have the freedom to choose their careers and
work
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 locations. To clarify, working abroad can provide better opportunities, higher salaries, and valuable international experience.
For example
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,
professionals
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 who gain experience in other countries may return with improved skills and knowledge, which can benefit their home
country
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 in the long term.
Furthermore
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, restricting movement may limit personal development and reduce motivation. To recapitulate, it is evident that requiring
professionals
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 to
work
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 in their home
country
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 can protect national investment and maintain essential services,
while
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 allowing freedom supports personal growth and global opportunities. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that
professionals
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 should have the freedom to
work
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 abroad,
although
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 reasonable policies may be introduced to encourage them to contribute to their home countries.

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task response
For task response, your ideas answer all parts, but your opinion can be stronger and more direct in the main body, not only at the end.
task response
For task response, some examples are clear, but they are still general. Add one more specific example to make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow because each paragraph has one clear focus.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you use linking words well, but some are a bit formal or repeated. Try to vary them in a more natural way.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some sentences are a little long. Shorter sentences can make your ideas even clearer.
task response
You discuss both views and give your opinion, so the task is fully covered.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are both clear and fit the topic well.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are in a logical order, so the reader can follow your ideas easily.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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