Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful, but they are also likely to suffer from negative social consequences. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Presently, a high average working hour is considered an important factor in enhancing the economic development of many nations, which
also
causes detrimental social repercussions. In my perspective, I firmly concur with this
view because I recognize several advantages and drawbacks of working for a longer time
, which impact both the economy and social aspects of those countries.
In terms of the country's economy, when people devote more time
to work
that could lay the foundation for various financial advancements in the long term. More working time
could increase productivity and the volume of produced products, which is synonymous with an improvement in national GDP, allowing countries to foster their financial status. Take Japan as a potential example of this
, Japanese workers spend more time
at work
than the world’s average working time
, directly influencing the effectiveness and overall
profits of their own country. Therefore
, Japan is known as a country with a strong financial status compared to others in the world due to
the consistent contribution of Japan’s hard-working labor
force.
Regarding society, the issues related to citizens’ health and unbalanced lives are not disregarded. In some countries where workers devoting more Change the spelling
labour
time
to complete their work
may take a heavy toll on labor
health Change the spelling
labour
due to
the heavy workload and working pressure that people have suffered from for a long span of time
. As a result
, the detrimental phenomena, namely having a sense of daunting, fatigue, and lack of motivation for work
, have become ubiquitous in those nations. In addition
, the possibility of achieving work
-life balance status is more challenging when workers may have limited quality time
for their beloved
relationships, Correct your spelling
loved
spelling
trouble Verb problem
causing
for
strengthening family bonds and improving the sense of community in society.
In conclusion, I hold a supportive view that having longer working Change preposition
in
time
is attributed to a nation’s economic success which may implicate some drawbacks in terms of sociable aspects such
as people’s health and lifestyle.Submitted by thanhtu.thcsbt on
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task achievement
Your essay responds to the prompt thoughtfully and addresses both the economic benefits and social drawbacks of long working hours, fulfilling the task requirements effectively. However, enhance the analysis with more detailed examples and elaboration to improve depth. Aim for clearer, more comprehensive ideas.
coherence cohesion
While your ideas are mostly clear, work on linking sentences and paragraphs more fluidly. This will improve the logical flow of your essay. Ensure that each point transitions smoothly into the next to maintain coherence throughout your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a solid introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your argument and reflect a clear stance.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples, such as the example of Japan, to support your main points, which strengthens the credibility of your argument.