In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development.

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Global population is increasing trend all over the world

due to

Linking Words

the higher birth rate and relocation being a normal phenomenon.

However

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, the influx of people from rural

areas

Use synonyms

to the cities has its pros and cons.

This

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essay will analyse

this

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topic from both points of view and present my opinion. It is true that more people are moving in from the countryside to look for better opportunities. Nowadays, many young generations move to bigger cities to look for higher paying jobs, leaving

lesser

Correct article usage

a lesser

show examples

workforce to work in the agricultural sector in the countryside.

Besides

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this

Linking Words

would

also

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contribute to pollution with the growing number of vehicles

such

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as in India, where the air quality in metropolitan is poor

in addition

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to the stress from the noise pollution from the vehicles honking.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

these cons are valid, they fail to consider the positive impact it can impart to the nation. One of the main positive impacts of

this

Linking Words

development is that it would boost the economy of a country. When more citizens move into the urban

areas

Use synonyms

, it would create a concentrated market for foreign investors.

For in

Change preposition

show examples

India, Bangalore became the IT hub and service provider in the Asian region.

Besides

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, the government will be forced to flow in money to build some facilities and transportation to develop rural

areas

Use synonyms

in order to retain manpower for other needed sectors

such

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as agriculture.

Therefore

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this

Linking Words

would

further

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contribute to the improvement of a country in every area of development. In conclusion, the movement of people from rural

areas

Use synonyms

may cause overcrowding and pollution but it

also

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has enormous

economical

Correct word choice

economic

show examples

benefits to the country.

Therefore

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, I strongly agree that

this

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changes

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

more positive impact than negativity.

coke_sarsSat Jul 20 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence, ensure that all sentences logically flow from one to the next. For example, add linking words or phrases where necessary.

task achievement

Work on expanding your supporting points with clearer examples and more detailed explanations. For instance, explain how the economy is boosted and why rural areas will also develop as a result.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the discussion effectively.

task achievement

The main points supporting both sides of the argument are relevant and address the topic directly.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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