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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many countries are experiencing serious problems with their environment, with pollution of their land, water and air. What are these problems and how might they be reduced?

#countries #environment #pollution #land #water #air
Nowadays, some countries suffer from contamination in multiple aspects,
such
 as
,
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Correct article usage
the environments
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environments
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environment
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, water, and air.
Pollution
 is defined as a negative and harmful influence that occurs in our nature,
usually
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usually,
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 it is caused by human beings,
according to
 some scholars.
This
 essay will discuss the consequences and solutions of
this
 phenomenon. Not only does
pollution
 result in multiple dire diseases, but it
also
 impacts negatively on the
wild life
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wildlife
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. The world has recently experienced dangerous viruses,
such
 as
,
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 COVID-19 which consumed severely the fortunes of the world in the
last
 decade. Agriculture, one of the most resources which most of the people depend on heavily, is
effected
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affected
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 by contamination.
As a result
, the productivity of
this
 sector has seen a substantial decrease. If the water, that all the lives of creatures on the earth rely on, is contaminated,
this
 absolutely will lead to devastation. Governments must grasp the hazard of the situation and ramp up their effort to clamp down on the widespread
to
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of
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this
 issue. Taking
this
 into account, some scholars claim that the spread of
the
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apply
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pollution
 stems from factories. So, these factories should be moved away from the residential areas. The isolation of these factories and their
waist
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waste
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 will reduce the problems of contamination since it is the main cause
for
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of
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 it. Another solution is
that
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apply
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following safety instructions in terms of dealing with hazardous materials
that
is
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are
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 used in several facilities,
such
 as
,
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 hospitals or labs. In conclusion, people should realize the menace of
the
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apply
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pollution
on
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in
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 their
life
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lives
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.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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task achievement
To improve task response, include more specific examples and evidence to support your points, such as statistical data or case studies. Making your arguments more concrete will help achieve a higher score in this criterion.
coherence cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, work on the logical structure of your essay. Ensure each paragraph logically follows the previous one, and use more transition words to create smoother flow between ideas. This will help in forming a more cohesive essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and a concise conclusion, which helps structure your response well.
task achievement
The main points are generally well supported, and the essay addresses the question asked, touching upon both the problems and solutions related to pollution.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ecosystem
  • sustainable
  • renewable energy
  • carbon footprint
  • emissions
  • deforestation
  • conservation
  • biodiversity
  • regulatory standards
  • composting
  • urban sprawl
  • green technologies
  • environmental degradation
  • waste management
  • pollutants
  • non-biodegradable
What to do next:
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