The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The table demonstrates the contribution of various computer companies to the economy of the
share
market for the years 2006 and 2007 including 2014.
Overall
,
it is clear that
HP
company holds the highest market
value
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
throughout the period followed by the Dell brand.
However
, a wide range of variations and fluctuations were listed with other organisations. In the year 2006, the
HP
brand had a
share
of 31.4% which increased over time and reached 34.25% in 2014,
whereas
the Dell company's portion was about half of the
HP
initially
.
However
, it was increased by almost 10% by the end of the term.
In addition
,the other organisation
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
name, Toshiba, was marked with
continuous
Correct article usage
a continuous
show examples
upward trend during the period and
finally
, its
share
was about one-fourth of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
HP
's
share
value
.
On the other hand
, the price of the
samsung
Change the capitalization
Samsung
show examples
and Lenovo brands'
share
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced a deviation in the year 2007 from 11.6 % and 6.6%, which were their
intial
Correct your spelling
initial
values respectively.
However
, at
last
,the former's
value
was about half of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Dell's
whereas
the latter holds about one-fifth
value
of the
HP
brand.
Furthermore
, the market
value
of Fujitsu and other brands was reduced over the span.
Submitted by sivaleelamahendra1214 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, whereas".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words share, hp, value with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • market share
  • percentage points
  • market presence
  • ranking
  • market leader
  • least market share
  • total market share
  • market consolidation
  • market diversification
  • new entrants
  • exits
  • highlight
  • compare
  • decline
  • increase
  • improvement
  • loss of ground
  • manufacturer
  • worldwide
  • notebook computer
  • notable
  • significant
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