Some believe that violent computer games are just a form of entertainment, while others think they lead directly to violent behavior. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In contemporary society, the debate over the influence of violent computer
games
on behaviour
continues to be contentious. While
some argue that these games
are merely a form of entertainment
, others contend that they directly contribute to aggressive tendencies. This
essay will explore both perspectives before concluding with an opinion on the matter.
Advocates of violent computer games
as harmless entertainment
often highlight the lack of conclusive evidence linking gameplay to real-life violence. Research conducted by Ferguson and Olson (2014) suggests that the correlation between violent video games
and aggressive behaviour
is weak at best. Additionally
, proponents argue that such
games
provide an outlet for stress and frustration, allowing individuals to unwind in a controlled virtual environment rather than resorting to violence in reality.
Conversely
, opponents argue that the desensitization to violence and the reinforcement of aggressive behaviour
within these games
can translate into real-life actions. Studies have shown a significant increase in aggressive thoughts and behaviour
among individuals exposed to violent gaming content. Furthermore
, the immersive nature of these games
can blur the lines between fantasy and reality, potentially leading players to mimic violent actions in their daily lives.
In conclusion, whilst the debate over the impact of violent computer games
on behaviour
remains unresolved, it is crucial to consider the potential risks they pose. Whereas
some view them as harmless entertainment
, others raise valid concerns about their influence on aggressive tendencies. Personally, I believe that albeit
these Correct word choice
although
games
may not directly cause violent behaviour
, they can certainly exacerbate pre-existing inclinations towards aggression. Therefore
, it is essential for individuals, particularly parents and guardians, to monitor and regulate exposure to such
content, ensuring a balance between entertainment
and responsible behaviour
.Submitted by nzgvrv on
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Task Achievement
To improve your 'task achievement' score, incorporate a broader range of specific examples that directly support your arguments. Using cases, research findings, or statistics can strengthen your position and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
Ensure a more balanced discussion of both views before providing your conclusion. While your essay presents a well-structured argument, dedicating more space to each perspective equally can enhance the overall balance and effectiveness of your response.
Coherence & Cohesion
Enhance your ‘coherence and cohesion’ through more varied and complex sentence structures. Though your essay is well-organized, utilizing a wider range of sentence forms can improve flow and readability, making your argument more engaging and easier to follow.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider the use of linking words and phrases to better connect ideas and paragraphs. This will help in making the transition between sections smoother, allowing for a more cohesive argument that is easier for the reader to follow.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.