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Writing Samples
Band 7

The diagram shows proposed changes to Foster Road. Write a 150-word report describing the proposed changes for a local committee.

The diagram shows proposed changes to Foster Road. Write a 150-word report describing the proposed changes for a local committee.
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The figures depict how the changes that have occurred in Foster
Road
Use synonyms
 between 1984 and 1985.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most noticeable change is pedestrianization and greener than before. By 1984, there was a main
road
Use synonyms
 that had 2-way with 5 buildings to the left and 4 buildings to the right. After the following year in 1985, the
road
Use synonyms
 was reduced because on both sides some trees were added and
then
Linking Words
 the areas became greener. In the middle way, it was made a new crossing for integrate two areas with a white line and
built
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a new space for a red light, and
then
Linking Words
 it
can
Verb problem
was
show examples
 easy for people to cross.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
road
Use synonyms
 was reduced to
developed
Correct article usage
a developed
show examples
 walking area. In that same year, it was built for pedestrianization.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the line in the
road
Use synonyms
 was removed in 1985.
Although
Linking Words
 Foster
Road
Use synonyms
 was developed, the building
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there was not altered.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words road with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reduced" was used 2 times.
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