In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the popluation in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In Pakistan, many
people
from interior Sindh and Punjab are moving to urban cities like Karachi and Lahore. The migration of people
is decreasing the population in the coutryside
. Correct your spelling
countryside
This
is a positive development in Pakistan.
Pakistan's economy is
struggling in the past 10 years, especially Wrong verb form
has been
it's
agricultural sector. Correct your spelling
its
On
the countryside of Change preposition
In
Paksitan
, earning Correct your spelling
Pakistan
opportunites
exist only in farming, cropping and harvesting activities. Unfortunately, there are no investments being made in Correct your spelling
opportunities
this
sector due to
which there is a lack of innnovation
and development, leaving Correct your spelling
innovation
people
with less opportunity to earn in the coutryside
, where survival is Correct your spelling
countryside
dificult
in times of high inflation.
On the other side, there are opportunities for Correct your spelling
difficult
labor
to work in Change the spelling
labour
the
urban cities, where the Correct article usage
apply
constuction
industry is active. Investments are being pumped in resulting in Correct your spelling
construction
construction
of a large number of high rises. Add an article
the construction
This
is an appealing opportunity for the uneducated people
in the countryside to move to urban cities for a better life.
The government officials think that it is the right decision to support the construction industry so that the country's GDP grows fast. The influx of labor
force from Change the spelling
labour
countryside
will help in the growth of GDP.Add an article
the countryside
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt and provides examples relevant to Pakistan, which is excellent. To improve further, make sure to expand on your points and provide a more balanced view. Consider discussing potential drawbacks of the rural-urban migration.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical flow, but it can be enhanced by creating clear paragraphs for each main idea. Linking sentences and using transition words will help in making the essay more cohesive.
coherence cohesion
While the main points are supported with examples, a stronger introduction and a proper conclusion will strengthen your essay. Introduce the main ideas briefly in the introduction and summarize them with a strong concluding statement.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant examples specific to Pakistan, which enhances the task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The essay logically discusses the economic opportunities in urban areas versus rural areas, supporting the main points clearly.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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