In some countries, even though the rates of serious crimes are decreasing, people feel less safe than ever before. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it?
In certain nations, despite a decline in severe crime rates, there is a growing sense of insecurity among the populace. The main reasons behind these are because of cyberbullying and scamming issues that are becoming trends nowadays. The most viable solutions are to not overshare information on social
media
and report to authorities immediately.
Firstly
, cyberbullying is one of the most common crimes these days and it usually occurs through social media
platforms. Thus
, the victims of cyberbullying are mainly young adults. It brings a lot of detrimental consequences because it could affect their mental health and lead them to unalive themselves. For example
, several Korean singers attempted suicide in 2022 due to
the hate they received on social media
. Additionally
, the prevalence of fraudulent activities has reached alarming levels. In contrast
, this
issue frequently happens among middle-aged citizens as they lack a sense of cyber security.
To tackle these issues, one effective strategy is to educate people about social media
etiquette. This
would ensure that people are not oversharing on social media
, especially confidential information like home address and phone number, or leaving hate comments on anyone’s posts. Moreover
, another solution is to report to the authorities if your information has been leaked by fraud. For instance
, the Malaysian Communication and Multimedia Commission (MCMC) is a regulatory body whose key role is the regulation of the communications and multimedia industry.
In conclusion, online harassment and scammers are the main factors why residents do not feel secure anymore. However
, educating everyone about online usage and bringing to the attention of authorities if there are any issues can be effective solutions to address these problems.Submitted by maisarahamirah16 on
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task response
The essay successfully addresses the task, identifying and explaining two main causes for the perceived insecurity despite decreasing crime rates. It also proposes viable measures to combat these issues. To further enhance the Task Response, include more specific evidence or examples, perhaps from more countries, to support your claims.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, improving transitions between paragraphs could make the essay even more cohesive. Adding linking phrases or words can help in this regard.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are very clear, setting the stage for your arguments and summarizing them effectively.
task response
Your essay covers relevant examples, such as the case of Korean singers and the Malaysian Communication and Multimedia Commission (MCMC), which support your arguments well.
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