IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

more and more tasks we do at home and at work these days are done by robots.Is this a positive or negative development?

#tasks #home #work #robots #development
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In recent years,
robots
Use synonyms
 have become ubiquitous, infiltrating both our homes and workplaces.
While
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 their presence promises efficiency and convenience, I believe
this
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 trend is an adverse development.
Firstly
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, the overuse of automatic machines leads to a sedentary lifestyle. As these automated helpers take over chores, we find ourselves less physically active. Whether it’s vacuuming the house or assembling products in factories,
robots
Use synonyms
 handle tasks that once required human effort.
Consequently
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, we spend more time sitting, which negatively impacts our health.
Secondly
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, excessive reliance on brain-child machines can result in job displacement. Industries increasingly adopt automation to cut costs and improve efficiency.
While
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 these benefit companies, they frequently leave workers unemployed. As
robots
Use synonyms
 take over repetitive tasks, human employees find themselves redundant.
This
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 shift threatens livelihoods and contributes to economic inequality.
Moreover
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, the emotional and social aspects of work suffer when AI dominate. Human interactions foster camaraderie, creativity, and problem-solving. When artificial intelligence replaces colleagues, we lose the richness of shared experiences.
Additionally
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, relying solely on machines diminishes our ability to adapt and learn new skills. In conclusion,
while
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robots
Use synonyms
 undoubtedly offer advantages, their widespread adoption poses significant challenges. We must strike a balance, ensuring that technology enhances our lives without compromising our well-being, employment opportunities, and social connections. Only
then
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 can we truly benefit from
this
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 technological revolution.We again must strike a balance, ensuring that technology enhances our lives without compromising our well-being, employment opportunities, and social connections. Only
then
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 can we truly benefit from
this
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 technological revolution.
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coherence cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures to enhance the flow and readability of your essay.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. This will add depth to your arguments, making them more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Be mindful of minor repetitions, such as the repetition in the conclusion. Aim for concise and distinct sentences to reinforce your main points more effectively.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task, addressing both the positive and negative aspects of robotic automation.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure is well-maintained, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported, although could benefit from more specific examples.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Artificial intelligence (AI)
  • Humanoid
  • Machine learning
  • Task allocation
  • Operational costs
  • Manual labor
  • Disruptive technology
  • Ergonomics
  • Unemployment
  • Cybersecurity
  • Technological singularity
  • Redundant workforce
  • Innovation
  • Ethical considerations
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