Young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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The number of crimes committed by juveniles is rising day by day. Some individuals

Correct word choice

apply

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find that the same rules that apply to adults should apply to youngsters who commit crimes. As their

behavior

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behaviour

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can be altered, and they can be easily influenced by anyone, I strongly disagree with

this

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view. I have some reasons why the given statement is incorrect.

To begin

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with,

children

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's minds are impressionable and can easily distracted,

furthermore

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, they do not fully mature until the age of 18.

Therefore

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, since they are not fully responsible for

the

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their

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wrongdoings, giving them

adults'

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adult'

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type punishments is not fair.

Instead

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, by keeping a

clothes

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eye on their

children

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's activities and social interactions, parents may be able to prevent them from committing crimes.

For example

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, recently India has amended the law articles and given relaxation to young people for Crime commitment based on the severity, condition and performance of the crime.

In addition

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, juveniles have a low maturity level and have limited knowledge and awareness to realize the impacts and consequences of wrong things.

However

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they're

Correct your spelling

their

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bad

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

can be changed through various ways like rehabilitation

centers

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centres

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, therapy and medication. The government needs to

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apply

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re-educate and re-socialize you know offenders rather than providing them

severe

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with severe

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punishments. To cite an example, many European countries have rehabilitation

centers

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centres

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for offenders under 18 years of age, and their Improvement rate is 93%. In conclusion,

children

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should be treated carefully until they reach adulthood because they are a country's future.

However

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, there are other factors that should be considered as well, like parental negligence, social media, and society, which can have a negative impact on

children

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rajwants.1997Mon Jul 22 2024

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task achievement

Your essay effectively addresses the task prompt by stating a clear stance and providing supporting reasons. However, make sure all sentences flow logically and focus on the topic to avoid repetitions and minor inaccuracies.

coherence cohesion

Your ideas are well-organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Ensure that each paragraph is fully developed with topic sentences, supporting details, and proper transitions to improve coherence.

general

Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Proofread your essay to catch mistakes such as "their children's activities" which should be "their child's activities" and "clothes eye" which should be "close eye".

task achievement

The essay has a clear stance on the topic with relevant examples such as the amendments in India's law and the rehabilitation centers in Europe. These examples effectively support the arguments.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear and structured introduction and conclusion. The introduction sets up the issue, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.

task achievement

The use of real-world examples strengthens the arguments made and adds authenticity to your essay.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

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