Some people think that employers should ensure a supportive and pleasant work environment where each employee is respected and valued equally while others think employers should focus instead on providing better facilities and equipment. what is your opinion?
Many individuals believe that
one
of the crucial criteria that employers ought to focus on is providing a work
spirit that will allow the employee to develop and be recognized. On the other hand
, some people argue that instruments and proper working place what is important. In my opinion, both of them are essential and related to each other.
On the one
hand, many employees
prefer to work
in a supportive work
even if the salary is less than in other places. They love to notice improvement throughout their life and to feel that they are valuable in their work
and their communities as well. In addition
, many of them before asking about the salary, ask about the environment of the work
to see if it is going to suit them or not. For example
, many of the employee who are not improving in their job will feel unsatisfied about what they are doing.
Conversely
, improvement will be easier if you have great facilities in your work
. Appropriate equipment are
useful for Change the verb form
is
employees
to accomplish their work
faster and do it in a proper way, and the employees
who know how to deal with these instruments will be valuable more than the others. Furthermore
, they will be able to do more than one
thing at the same time, and multi-tasking is one
of the important things for employers. For example
, a banker who is able to deal properly with the computer, money machine and customers will be more respected than others.
In conclusion, I believe that providing perfect work
tools contributes to supporting the employees
, and
achieving what they want in their Correct word choice
apply
work
and gaining the respect that they waited for.Submitted by okalqusay on
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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and show that you have a thorough understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Ensure that your ideas are detailed and clearly explained to avoid ambiguity. This will help readers fully grasp your arguments and see the connections between them.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, consider using more transitional phrases and connectors. This will help link ideas smoothly and provide a clearer structure to your writing.
coherence cohesion
Work on sentence variety and complexity to make your essay more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.
task achievement
You have addressed both perspectives on the topic in your essay, demonstrating a balanced view, which is great for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps give it a structured framework.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are logically organized, making it easy for readers to follow your argument.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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