The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in Canada in 2005 and 2010.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The two pie charts show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in Canada in 2005 and in two thousand tenths. These pie charts have four sectors: Electronics &

Appliance

Fix the agreement mistake

Appliances

show examples

, Food & Beverage,

Home

Use synonyms

Furnishings

Use synonyms

and Video Games. In 2005, the most online sales

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

Electronics & Appliance reached

thirty five

Add a hyphen

thirty-five

show examples

per cent.

While

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

in 2010 it was only 30%. Food & Beverage followed with 22%,

while

Linking Words

Home

Use synonyms

Furnishings

Use synonyms

and Video Games made up 25% and 18%, respectively. By 2010, notable shifts had occurred. Food & Beverage experienced the most significant growth, rising to 32% and becoming the largest segment.

Conversely

Linking Words

, Electronics & Appliances saw a decline, dropping to 30%. Sales of

Home

Use synonyms

Furnishings

Use synonyms

decreased substantially from 25% to 15%, making it the smallest category in 2010. Meanwhile, Video Games grew from 18% to 23%, surpassing

Home

Use synonyms

Furnishings

Use synonyms

dnm.bestTue Jul 23 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 89%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words home, furnishings with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.

▼

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

138 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

retail sectors
online shopping sales
significant growth/decline
consumer behavior
market trends
economic factors
technological advancements
sales percentages
emerged
evolution
notable
constancies

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree?
There is no denying the fact that there are many various options for purchasing clothes some are affordable and others is expensive. While it is a commonly held belief that it is worse to buy many cheaper clothes, rather than a few expensive clothes. There is also an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that there is no reason to force yourself by buying a few expensive clothes instead of buying many cheaper clothes, so it's a better choice.
6.5
band
Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
As the scope of the development in urban areas improves, there will be a lot of issues created. Few people assume that this is caused by an increase in the number of cars. While others believe that there are various other aspects causing issues in the cities. This essay discusses both views, while I believe there are other serious problems which are contributing more than an increase in the car count.
6
band
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
How to handle a difficult situation can vary from person to person. While some prefer to adapt to the situation, others try to cope with it. In my opinion, I strongly agree with the latter group.
9
band
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Your friend is thinking about learning to drive and would like some advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter • say why a driving licence is advantageous • recommend a driving school • give any extra guidance/tips You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear..., You should write at least 150 words.
Hope you're doing great. I'm so happy to hear that you've been considering taking up a driving course.
7.5
band
Some people believe that children’s time outside of school should be filled with scheduled activities such as art and music classes and sports. Others feel that children need free time to play and relax. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is argued by different groups of the crowds whether or not the scheduled activities either art, sports or music classes ought to be spent by the children during the time outside of school instead of having free time to play and relax. From my prospect, I opine that the freedom of the children to relax is the most vital.

The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in Canada in 2005 and 2010.

It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that children’s time outside of school should be filled with scheduled activities such as art and music classes and sports. Others feel that children need free time to play and relax. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.