Some societies think that it is better for high school students to study a wide range of subjects than to focus on a narrow range of subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some societies believe that studying a wide
range
of subjects
in school is essential for high school students
, while
some argue that being focused only on several subjects
is better. In my opinion, I agree that being focused on a specific range
of subjects
is a better option, considering the advantages that it has.
To begin
with, focusing only on a narrow range
of subjects
provides you more time to do other errands or activities, such
as hobbies. It is undeniable that learning some academic matters is crucial. However
, doing other activities is also
important as well to keep our emotional health fit, considering that studying is likely stressful for some people. For example
, if they keep the balance between learning and doing such
good activities, they will be less stressed because the body will stimulate hormones to reduce overwhelming feelings.
Moreover
, learning fewer subjects
consistently helps students
to gain more information about the subjects
. I believe that students
who are learning a wide range
of studies
will have lots of materials to read, making them have difficulty understanding or to memorize the information provided. In contrast
, students
who have a small range
of studies
have more possibilities to gain and retain what they read, thus
, they have a profound understanding of the materials. For instance
, it is seen that people can be experts in any field because they did not study a wide range
of subjects
, but learned and focused on one single subject that eventually made them expertise
in their fields.
In conclusion, learning all Replace the word
expert
studies
leads students
to have less time to do other errands and makes them struggle to obtain further
information about specific studies
. Consequently
, it is better for students
to pick the subjects
that they like in order to be experts.Submitted by firmansyahafandy99 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay structure is good overall. However, try to make your transitions between ideas smoother to further improve the flow of your essay. You might consider using more linking words and phrases.
task achievement
Your arguments are relevant and well-supported, but you could enhance them by providing more diverse and specific examples. This will make your points more convincing.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and your position, which sets a clear direction for your essay.
supported main points
You provide logical reasoning for your points of view, such as the emotional benefits of having hobbies and the advantage of focusing on fewer subjects for better understanding.
