Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?
So far, science has been utilizing
animals
by means of examination, however
, this
situation is causing to violation of animal rights. This
essay discusses alternative ways of experimentation without animals
.
Many people believe that , today several cosmetic companies
are using animals
moreover
, they are searching for the creatures . For example
, during the process of perfume, the animals
are being used in order to emerge
a negative effect on perfume when will Verb problem
have
be
bought by people. Wrong verb form
is
Also
, scientists are benefiting from animals
such
as searching detrimental effects of vaccines. Even though that experiments which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
comes
from Change the verb form
come
animals
are beneficial for humans , it is the
unethical and illegitimate issue. Because of that , animal associations must deal with Correct article usage
an
this
problem.
Others argue that , all around the world governments should increase taken
measures to protect species of Verb problem
apply
animals
, especially endangered animals
. İn addition, every person who loves animals
can announce the eradication of species. For instance
, people can refuse the usage of cosmetic products or reduce them. Besides
, policymakers must prohibit experimentation on animals
and they can give a penalty to companies
which damages
on creatures. When it comes to other alternatives , lots of Change the verb form
damage
companies
have developed tech therefore
they do not need to use animals
for examinations also
companies
can use other methods including 3-D visual reality . Even ıf many discoveries derived from the elimination of animals
.
To conclude
, we have to respect across
the Change preposition
apply
existing
of creatures , and we must remember all Replace the word
existence
animals
contribute to ecological balance.Submitted by kickbox191 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay should provide clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader and make your argument more logical.
task achievement
Try to develop your main points with more specific details and examples. For instance, describe specific technological alternatives that can replace animal testing.
general writing
There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrases that slightly hinder clarity. For example: 'However, this situation is causing to violation of animal rights' could be written as 'However, this situation violates animal rights.'
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame the issue and provide closure.
task achievement
You’ve included relevant specific examples such as the use of animals in cosmetic testing and vaccine research.
task achievement
You’ve demonstrated a good attempt to address both sides of the argument, covering both the ethical concerns and the scientific benefits.