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Writing Samples
Band 5

The chats below show the percentage of students joining North West University.

#chats #show #percentage #students #west #university
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The pie charts provide information about the proportion of
students
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 in different faculties and the regional distribution of art
faculty
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students
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 at
North West
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North-West
show examples
 University.
It is clear that
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 the majority of
students
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 chose the business
faculty
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, followed by computing.
In contrast
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, fewer
students
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 opt for medicine and law.
Moreover
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, the second pie chart shows that most arts
students
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 are South American. Looking at the information in more detail, the proportion of
students
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 in the art
faculty
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 accounts for 23%. The percentages of computing and science are similar, at 22% and 21%, respectively.
Additionally
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, 14% of
students
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 are in the business
faculty
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, and the other categories—engineering, medicine, and law—are each less than 10%. In terms of the number of art
students
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, it can be seen that the largest figure is in South America with 79
students
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, followed by 21
students
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 from Europe. As for the number of Asian and Australian
students
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, there are 6 and 4, respectively.
Furthermore
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, only 3
students
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 come from Africa
according to
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 the chart.
Submitted by zora840810 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized and easy to follow. However, to get an even higher score, consider providing a brief concluding sentence to summarize the main points.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to continuously link your ideas and paragraphs seamlessly to achieve an even smoother flow. Transitional words and phrases can help.
task achievement
To achieve full marks in task response, include more specific data points and comparisons that highlight key insights drawn from the charts.
task achievement
Try to elaborate a bit more on the less represented faculties to provide a comprehensive view of all data.
task achievement
You have clearly addressed all parts of the prompt and the data has been accurately interpreted.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is relatively well-structured, with a clear introduction, body, and observations.
task achievement
The use of specific numbers and percentages helps to support your main points effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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