The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia´s share of the Japanese tourist markey. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#show #japanese #tourists #australia´s #tourist #markey #summerise #information #features #comparisons
There are two charts the first one shows the
number
of Japanese
tourists
who traveled
abroad from 1985 and 1995 Change the spelling
travelled
while
the other chart illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
the
Australia´s share of the Correct article usage
apply
Japanese
tourist market.Well, there are a lot of noticable
things that can be observed.Correct your spelling
noticeable
notable
Over all
, we can see that the Correct your spelling
Overall
number
Japanese
Change preposition
of Japanese
tourists
travelling abroad is increasing without any flluctation
through the years and Correct your spelling
fluctuation
fluctuations
the
Australia´s share of the Correct article usage
apply
Japanese
tourist market is increasing also
but with a fall down in 1989.
On the one hand, we can see that the highest proportion of Japanese
tourists
was in
Change preposition
at
it's
best in 1995 with nearly 15 Correct your spelling
its
millions
Change to singular
million
traveler
.Change the spelling
traveller
Morover
,the Correct your spelling
Moreover
lesst
Correct your spelling
lowest
number
of Japanese
tourists
was in 1985 with approximately 5 million traveler
.Change to a plural noun
travelers
In addition
, between the period 1990 and 1993
the Add a comma
1993,
number
of Japanese
tourists
who travel
abroad was approximately 11 million.
Wrong verb form
travelled
On the other hand
,alot
of things can be Correct your spelling
a lot
observrd
in Australia´s share of the Correct your spelling
observed
Japanese
tourist market.First of all,we can see that the highest proportion was in 1994 with nearly 7.Further more
,in 1989 the proportion Correct your spelling
Furthermore
droped
Correct your spelling
dropped
down
to Change preposition
apply
be
nearly 4.Unnecessary verb
apply
Finally
, we can see that between 1989 and 1993 there was no drop down
.Correct your spelling
dropdown
Submitted by yousefreyad55 on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, japanese, tourists with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "droped" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.
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