The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer and the poor are even getting poorer. Some people think that governments are responsible for this issue, and others think it is the responsibility of individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#gap #people #governments #responsibility #individuals

The gap between the rich and the poor is getting wider. Some

people

believe that

governments

are responsible for

this

problem,

while

others think

individuals

should take responsibility. In my opinion, the government has a greater role to play in solving

this

issue.

People

who think the government is responsible argue that policies and laws can create or reduce inequality.

Governments

can use taxes to help balance the wealth. By taxing rich

people

more, they can collect money to support public services like schools, hospitals, and social programs that help the poor.

Governments

can

also

make sure everyone gets a good education and healthcare. When everyone has access to these basic needs, it gives poor

people

a better chance to improve their lives.

For example

, good schools can help children from low-income families get better jobs in the future.

On the other hand

, some

people

believe

individuals

are responsible for their own economic status. They argue that hard work and smart decisions can help

people

succeed, regardless of their background.

For example

, getting a good education and learning new skills can open up better job opportunities.

People

can

also

start their own businesses. Entrepreneurship can lead to financial success and create jobs for others.

Additionally

, managing money wisely by saving and investing can help

individuals

build wealth over time.

To sum up

while

individuals

should work hard to improve their lives, the government needs to take the lead in addressing economic inequality. By using taxes to fund public services, ensuring access to education and healthcare, and regulating businesses,

governments

can help create a fairer society where everyone has a chance to succeed.

Submitted by raufpasayev83 on Wed Jul 24 2024

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task achievement

Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. This will make your arguments more compelling and help to fully engage the reader.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and contributes to your overarching argument. This will improve the coherence and logical flow of your essay.

task achievement

The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both perspectives on the issue.

coherence cohesion

The points made are clear and well-organized, making it easy to follow the writer's argument.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion, providing a solid foundation and closing for the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer and the poor are even getting poorer. Some people think that governments are responsible for this issue, and others think it is the responsibility of individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

Some people think an international car free day is an effective way to reduce air pollution.Others think there are more effective ways do to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some think the current generation should take steps to protect the environment for the next generation.to what extend do you agree or dis agree.

You recently broke your leg and your colleagues from work sent you get well cards and presents. Write a letter to them and say •Thanks them for supporting you. •Describe how you spend your time. •Explain about your recovery process.