As the number of cars increases, more money has to be spent on road systems. Some people think the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that drivers should cover the costs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The expenditure on the
road
system has become one of the hotly debated topics that divided opinions, due to
the increase of the quantity of cars recently. Many people think this
is the accountability of the government
, while
others consider that it is an individual role to pay for it. From my perspective, the government
bears responsibility for improving road
traffic.
On the one hand, the construction of the road
system requires a large amount of money which can exceed the government
’s financial capabilities sometimes. So citizens
participation plays a crucial role in Change noun form
citizen's
citizens'
this
process, especially the drivers who primarily benefit from this
. Moreover
, most people seem to pay more attention to what they spend money on, this
could give rise to their awareness about protecting and preserving these facilities, not to damage
them.
Change the verb form
damaging
On the other hand
, there is no doubt that it is the government
’s responsibility to uphold and enhance the road
infrastructure. Because
Correct word choice
This
this
is not only for the living standards of citizens but also
the
development of the economy. In fact, roads are key features for facilitating commerce, trade and tourism contributing to the prosperity of the nation, laying the foundation for numerous other fields to develop. Change preposition
for the
Moreover
, by using tax for the building and maintenance of streets, the governing bodies could ensure that all individuals could access a safe and convenient transport system.
In conclusion, although
the government
or the driver funding are both important for public facilities, I am of the opinion that the government
should cover these issues' budget according to
their role and obligation.Submitted by ngocthuykatie on
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task achievement
Your introduction succinctly sets the stage for the discussion and clearly states your own viewpoint. To further enhance your response, consider including more detailed and specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, and each paragraph deals with a specific aspect of the topic. The transitions between paragraphs are smooth, but varying your linking phrases could improve the overall flow.
task achievement
While your main points are adequately supported, adding more specific examples and elaborating on them could strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, providing a clear framework for your discussion.
task achievement
You have presented both sides of the argument fairly and provided your own opinion in a clear and concise manner.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph is focused and relevant to the topic, contributing to a coherent and cohesive essay.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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