In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.
Many people
has
agreed that in the developed world, the Change the verb form
have
life
expectancy
of the average person is increasing. The increase
of
Change preposition
in
life
expectancy
will cause various problems
, but there are some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact
of these problems
.
One of the problems
that the increase
of
the Change preposition
in
expectancy
of life
will cause is overpopulation. Overpopulation has never really been a problem in the past, because the average life
expectancy
of individuals
were
not as high as it is today. But because it has increased and the number of Change the verb form
was
birth
is not reducing, there will be more and more people in the world Fix the agreement mistake
births
everytime
a new individual is born. Overpopulation will cause various Replace the word
every time
of
Change preposition
apply
problems
for society, for example
, the demand for food will increase
significantly and the prices for food will increase
as well, not to mention
one day food resources will run out and if it does run out, everyone will die of starvation.
There are some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact
of this
problem. The increase
of life
expectancy
is not a bad thing so reducing the average life
expectancy
will not be an ideal approach to reduce the impact
of ageing populations. An ideal solution will be to reduce the number of newborn individuals
by making an internasional
policy that limits the number of children that a family can have. Correct your spelling
international
This
measure is effective because the average life
expectancy
will not be reduced while
the amount of individuals
that are born will be more controlled.
In conclusion, the increase
of
the average Change preposition
in
life
expectancy
in the developed world causes some problems
for both individuals
and society, but there are measures that could reduce the impact
of these problems
.Submitted by riani.the2 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively introduces the topic and states the problems and potential measures. Try providing more specific examples in your body paragraphs to strengthen your argument and make your essay more comprehensive and persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas more clearly. Consider breaking down your points into distinct sections and ensure each paragraph has a clear focus. Some sentences could be clearer with transitions for better flow.
task achievement
Expand on your points by providing detailed explanations and consider other potential problems or measures to address them. This can broaden your discussion and provide a more rounded response.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good framework for your response.
task achievement
You successfully address both parts of the task by discussing problems and potential solutions related to increased life expectancy.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.