The two pie charts illustrate the online shopping sales for retail sections in Canada in 2005 compared to the rates in 2010.

The two pie charts illustrate the online shopping sales for retail sections in Canada in 2005 compared to the rates in 2010. It is apparently seen that food & beverage and video games have experienced a

raise

Correct your spelling

rise

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

contrast to electronics & appliances and home furnishings.

For example

video

Correct article usage

the video

show examples

games section got a mere 5 per

cent

increase ,

meanwhile

Add a comma

meanwhile,

show examples

home furnishings got through an adverse trend by dropping ten per

cent

off. The numbers were 23% and fifteen per

cent

respectively.

Moreover

, food

supplies'

Change noun form

supplies

show examples

sales

rised

Correct your spelling

rose

raised

rise

slightly

for

Change preposition

show examples

up to ten per

cent

in five years

whilist

Correct your spelling

while

electronic

Replace the word

electronics

show examples

& appliances shows an adverse trend and

declines

Wrong verb form

declined

show examples

five per

cent

of the

retail's

Change noun form

retail

show examples

sales rate. It is worth noticing that despite the changes none of the above has had a considerate

raise

Correct your spelling

rise

show examples

or decline.

Submitted by dnm.best on Thu Jul 25 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrate" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "declines" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

133 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The two pie charts illustrate the online shopping sales for retail sections in Canada in 2005 compared to the rates in 2010.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Social media is becoming increasingly popular almost all age groups however sharing personal information on social media website does have risk do you think that the advantages of social media overweight disadvantages

Write a letter to a bookstore manager who is living in another city. Ask him/ her to make available a book that you are interested in. In you letter. - What book you are looking for? - Why you need this book. - How you plan to purchase the book.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.