With the rise of stream online, fewer people go to movie theatre for see films what are advantages and disadvantages of this trend?
Increasingly
world progress, many social applications are becoming very uncomplicated to use without any problems. In Correct word choice
As increasingly
this
essay
I will discuss the benefits and disadvantages of Add a comma
essay,
this
style. My personal perspective is that,
new streams are more useful Remove the comma
apply
due to
their abilities.
Going to cinemas to watch films have
been Correct subject-verb agreement
has
common
activity in the past.Add an article
a common
However
, today, many people want to achieve their wish without any action. Today, many movie
places has
a lot of limitations Change the verb form
have
such
as a person may not watch his film whatever he want
. And at the same time, it may Change the verb form
wants
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
to
their mood.
New online services have all opportunities to watch for Change preposition
apply
relax
. Replace the word
relaxation
For example
, if person
Add an article
a person
the person
want
to see a romantic Change the verb form
wants
movie
, it has enough circumstance
. Visiting Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
movie
place for watch film takes our full time and energy Correct article usage
a movie
as well
as
we may go there provided that we have any kind of food and window shopping and it requires Correct word choice
and
our
a lot of money than Correct pronoun usage
apply
see
online services.
Watching movies online has increased within a decade and Verb problem
apply
applied
new technology in order to enhance the clarity of Verb problem
apply
movie
quality for the fans. But, watch
the flickers from anywhere via devices Wrong verb form
watching
such
as smartphones or laptops not
give us the opportunity to watch our Add a missing verb
does not
movie
on a big screen with high definition audio system like live
Add an article
a live
movie
theatre. Observing movie
on Fix the agreement mistake
movies
phone
not Correct article usage
the phone
gets
your full day and you may utilize Wrong verb form
get
from
Change preposition
apply
that
whatever you want time.
Correct pronoun usage
apply
As
Change preposition
In
a
conclusion, Nowadays, many people Correct article usage
apply
less
tend to go theatre to watch movies than in the past. I strongly believe thatCorrect quantifier usage
apply
,
many customers have many choices to select and it may be easier to watch online Remove the comma
apply
contents
.Fix the agreement mistake
content
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task and provides a response to the advantages and disadvantages of streaming services over traditional movie theaters. However, there are some areas where clarity and depth can be improved. Focus on elaborating more on each point with specific examples and clearer explanations.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, enhancing the logical flow and coherence between the paragraphs will make your argument stronger. Using more linking words and phrases will help maintain a smoother flow of ideas.
general
Pay attention to grammatical errors and improve your vocabulary to enhance clarity. This can help in presenting your ideas more clearly and comprehensively.
task achievement
Try to use more specific examples to illustrate your points. This will not only make your arguments more convincing but also show a better understanding of the topic.
structure
Your introduction presents a clear topic and your conclusion summarizes the main points effectively.
task achievement
You have identified both advantages and disadvantages of streaming services, which indicates a balanced approach to the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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