Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and the homeless. Do you agree or disagree?

A considerable proportion of citizens adopt the notion that social deficiencies
such
as deflation and unsettlement request state intervention. I strongly agree with the former declaration, and
this
essay will hold the reasons for my view. To commence, leaving refugees, in rural areas, without any resources has numerous negative repercussions on national security.
In other words
, it would lead to major crime in the public because homeless people may attempt to steal essential merchandise from grocery stores in order to survive the day.
Moreover
, they could disturb tourists by demanding some financial assistance like money or clothing which will encroach on their personal privacies. To demonstrate, I was visiting Istanbul
last
summer when certain destitute persons appeared in my way requesting a couple of dollars.
Thus
, countries that possess a number of deprived individuals are suffering from harmful effects on their safety. Another compelling reason to support my view is disadvantaged communities are very similar to other social groups.
This
means that retired employees and patients with special disabilities are being suitably treated by the government, whether, they pay taxes or not.
Furthermore
, the majority of well-being is affected by ethics and moral values which motivate to reduce global poverty through charities and campaigns. As reported by UNICEF in 2020, one dollar per capita is sufficient to produce one meal which represents a fair cost to be contributed by each nation.
Hence
, deficient personals resemble every member of society. To summarize, every human living without accommodation or financial support is under public responsibility. I totally agree with
this
statement because the public sector should remove him from the streets to avoid disorder and should provide equal life opportunities among citizens.
Submitted by mohsen.souri93 on

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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets the stage for your essay. However, the term 'social deficiencies' is somewhat vague, and it could be replaced with clearer terms like 'unemployment and homelessness.'
coherence cohesion
Try to vary your vocabulary more to avoid repetition and to demonstrate a wider range of language skills.
task achievement
Your essay would benefit from a few more concrete examples, statistics, or references to studies to support your points more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, with each paragraph supporting your main argument.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples which help to illustrate your points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments and reinforces your position.

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