Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The advancements
of
public infrastructure hold significant importance for city layout and environmental sustainability. In my view, I strongly agree with the statement that more Change preposition
in
money
should be allocated by governments for the railway system.
The first reason why spending money
on railways
is a great decision is that it offers more public transport for urban people
, especially for those living in suburban areas. Although
investing in roads delivers an ease of commuting, it is merely beneficial for particular people
who own a personal vehicle. For instance
, by being provided with more railways
, people
would be more encouraged to choose trains for commuting or even traveling
since it's less effort, relatively cheaper, and Change the spelling
travelling
also
punctual. In fact, railway transportation could be considered as
one of the essential facilities in society, playing a vital role in human well-being.
The second Change preposition
apply
favor
of devoting Change the spelling
favour
money
to train systems is because
it helps Correct word choice
that
Correct article usage
the environments
environments
Fix the agreement mistake
environment
to reduce
pollution from carbon emissions emitted by fuel vehicles. To illustrate, lack of public transport could lead Change preposition
by reducing
people
to use private transportation, which possibly increases carbon footprints, giving directly the
detrimental effects to nature Correct article usage
apply
such
as climate change as well as
ozone depletion. Thus
, opting to develop more railways
gives the benefits not only for inhabitants but also
for the continuation of the living world.
In conclusion, spending money
on railways
not only helps people
with the convenience of transportation but also
protects the environment. Having considered the drawbacks, I remain firmly convinced that in spite of spending money
on roads, governments should spend on railways
.Submitted by karelrenaldi8 on
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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic, and it provides relevant examples and arguments to support your points. However, consider elaborating more on some of your points to provide a more comprehensive discussion. For instance, you could expand on the environmental benefits of railways with additional examples or data.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While your ideas are logically structured, using more transition words or phrases can enhance the flow of your essay. Additionally, vary your sentence structure to maintain reader engagement.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for your argument, and you provide a strong conclusion that reinforces your main points.
task achievement
You have effectively highlighted two main reasons to support your viewpoint, which makes your argument persuasive and focused.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite