Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The advancements
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
public infrastructure hold significant importance for city layout and environmental sustainability. In my view, I strongly agree with the statement that more
money
should be allocated by governments for the railway system. The first reason why spending
money
on
railways
is a great decision is that it offers more public transport for urban
people
, especially for those living in suburban areas.
Although
investing in roads delivers an ease of commuting, it is merely beneficial for particular
people
who own a personal vehicle.
For instance
, by being provided with more
railways
,
people
would be more encouraged to choose trains for commuting or even
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
since it's less effort, relatively cheaper, and
also
punctual. In fact, railway transportation could be considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one of the essential facilities in society, playing a vital role in human well-being. The second
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of devoting
money
to train systems is
because
Correct word choice
that
show examples
it helps
Correct article usage
the environments
show examples
environments
Fix the agreement mistake
environment
show examples
to reduce
Change preposition
by reducing
show examples
pollution from carbon emissions emitted by fuel vehicles. To illustrate, lack of public transport could lead
people
to use private transportation, which possibly increases carbon footprints, giving directly
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
detrimental effects to nature
such
as climate change
as well as
ozone depletion.
Thus
, opting to develop more
railways
gives the benefits not only for inhabitants but
also
for the continuation of the living world. In conclusion, spending
money
on
railways
not only helps
people
with the convenience of transportation but
also
protects the environment. Having considered the drawbacks, I remain firmly convinced that in spite of spending
money
on roads, governments should spend on
railways
.
Submitted by karelrenaldi8 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic, and it provides relevant examples and arguments to support your points. However, consider elaborating more on some of your points to provide a more comprehensive discussion. For instance, you could expand on the environmental benefits of railways with additional examples or data.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While your ideas are logically structured, using more transition words or phrases can enhance the flow of your essay. Additionally, vary your sentence structure to maintain reader engagement.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for your argument, and you provide a strong conclusion that reinforces your main points.
task achievement
You have effectively highlighted two main reasons to support your viewpoint, which makes your argument persuasive and focused.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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