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Nowadays online shopping has become more popular than in-store shopping. Is it a positive or negative development?

#development
Nowadays, online shopping
becomes
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
 more popular because
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
becomes
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
 available for everyone, making it possible to purchase any necessary thing despite the distance.
This
 offers numerous advantages to both consumers and companies,
such
 as
comfortale
Correct your spelling
comfortable
 shopping and
huge
Add an article
a huge
the huge
show examples
 level of daily sales.
Firstly
,
it is clear that
 the main
metris
Correct your spelling
metric
metrics
 for individuals is comfort shopping, which means they will be able to seek any things which they need at home saving their free
time
 and sometimes money.
In other words
, people will
eleminate
Correct your spelling
eliminate
 the need to visit special
shops
 avoiding extra costs for transport.
Moreover
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of online facilities are available all
time
Correct article usage
the time
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,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is why people can shop at any
time
. To illustrate, almost all people have only 2 days off which they would rather
to
Remove the marker
apply
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spend
to
Change preposition
on
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another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
doings
Correct your spelling
things
show examples
 and they cannot
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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visit physical shopping places after the job
also
 as they are
close
Replace the word
closed
show examples
 at night,
that is
 why the only way to buy goods wents via
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.
Secondly
,
internet
shops
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
also
 beneficial for companies,
due to
 the increased number of earnings. Before the
passability
Correct your spelling
possibility
show examples
to purchase
Change preposition
of purchasing
show examples
 something
through
Change preposition
apply
show examples
distance, humans
difficultly
Replace the word
difficulty
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found
Wrong verb form
finding
show examples
 free
time
 to visit their offers, but now thankfully
to
Change preposition
with
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developed
Correct article usage
a developed
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network
Add a comma
network,
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 there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 no barriers for consumers.
Hence
, revenue
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been rising, so more capital for production occurs.
For example
, common
shops
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 with others with
delivering
Replace the word
delivery
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facility
Fix the agreement mistake
facilities
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 are less successful nowadays
bacouse
Correct your spelling
because
 of
slight
Correct article usage
the slight
show examples
growing
Replace the word
growth
show examples
 of
company
Add an article
the company
show examples
.
To conclude
,
internet
shops
 are popular and beneficial for society and different companies as they
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
 comfort and
boosted
Wrong verb form
boost
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chance
Correct article usage
the chance
show examples
 to develop.
Submitted by hhaha9102 on

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coherence cohesion
Organize paragraphs clearly by using linking words or phrases to ensure a smooth transition between ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or detailed explanations to make your points more convincing.
general
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct any grammatical errors and typos, as these can affect comprehension.
task achievement
Try to elaborate on potential drawbacks of online shopping, even if you primarily view it as a positive development, to provide a balanced perspective.
task achievement
The essay covers both consumer and company perspectives, making it comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
A clear introduction and conclusion are present, effectively framing the essay.
task achievement
The essay highlights valid advantages of online shopping like convenience and increased revenue.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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