Some people say that social media is a digital drug that has left many people addicted enhanced their lots of valuable time while others say social media has Enable Connectivity with the world. Discuss both views and give your opinion on the topic.

#people #media #drug #lots #time #connectivity #world #topic

There is no denying the fact that Some individuals believe that the online trend is a deep dive into addiction that has left many people loss of their precious time.

While

it is a commonly held belief that social publishing is linked with the world, there is

also

an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that social publishing is a weapon used today for many reasons.

This

essay will discuss my opinion

along with

relevant examples and a logical conclusion.

To begin

with, nowadays, social publishing has a significant impact on mankind.

Although

there are massive privileges.

Such

as communication with each other across the world,

also

in current days books and educational materials are available online and everyone can take advantage of reading from it using it online through Facebook, zoom google Meetings etc,

For instance

, during the incident of COVID-19 the world has changed the way of education.

While

most pupils faced difficulty in learning online classes.

On the other hand

, technology has become advanced and made the community's lives easier.

Moreover

, folk get to know each other through online apps. In ancestor's days sending a message required years to arrive,

nevertheless

, lack of technology. In Mental issues, there are many side effects

as a result

of being a home buddy a person who enjoys staying at home prefers to do extracurricular activities and spend time with family and friends doing outdoor sports. Social news is a huge platform for those who seek new opportunities, despite some nations threatening businessmen and traders with stealing their personal information. In a nutshell, despite people having different views believe that the public can't live without social media since it takes away our time. Social media has a Gigantic network around the entire globe. There are fickle-minded people who use social media in a positive or negative way.

Submitted by saeeddjcj80 on Sun Jul 28 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your essay has a good foundation, but it can be tightened up to improve clarity and coherence. Work on creating smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance the flow of the essay.

task achievement

Although you have addressed both sides of the argument, make sure to provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points effectively. This will strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.

task achievement

Avoid repeated phrases or redundant information, as it can detract from the overall impact of your essay. Strive for concise and varied sentence structures to maintain the reader's interest.

task achievement

Your essay presents a balanced discussion of both perspectives on social media, which is crucial for a well-rounded argument.

coherence cohesion

You provide a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your essay and guide the reader through your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

psychological addiction
mental health
curated images
self-esteem
instant communication
geographic location
information dissemination
professional networking
responsible use
negative consequences
time wastage
productivity
social comparison
social movements

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Some people say that social media is a digital drug that has left many people addicted enhanced their lots of valuable time while others say social media has Enable Connectivity with the world. Discuss both views and give your opinion on the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The government's investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with the sentence?

Although more and more people read the news on the Internet, newspaper will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. Do you agree or disagree with that statement?

Space exploration is much too expensive and the money should be spent on more important things. Q: What is your opinion?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it’s a positive or negative development?