The government should reduce the amount of moeny spent on local environmental problems and instead increase funding into urgent and more threatening issues such as global warming. To what extent do you agree?
There are differing opinions regarding whether the government should concentrate on the threatening problems
for example
global warming instead
of spending a huge amount of financial support on local environmental issues. In my opinion, the urgent and threatening issues are the priority to focus on, but it should not underestimate the profound effect of the local environmental problems.
On one hand, there are notable influences of global threatening issues on many different aspects of people daily's lives and the whole global environment
. First of all, like global warming, it has seriously effected
many countries Correct your spelling
affected
in
Change preposition
with
the
climate change. There are more and more extreme natural disaters Correct article usage
apply
has
been reported since global warming Correct subject-verb agreement
have
has
drew Unnecessary verb
apply
Correct article usage
the attenion
attenion
Correct your spelling
attention
by
Change preposition
of
public
. Add an article
the public
Animal
Fix the agreement mistake
Animals
lived
Wrong verb form
living
on
Change preposition
in
the
cold Correct article usage
apply
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
has
declined because of the climateCorrect subject-verb agreement
have
is growing
. If each country can devote Verb problem
apply
themselves
a bit more Correct pronoun usage
itself
on
one target Change preposition
to
issue
, I believe problem
will be better Add an article
the problem
sovled
with Correct your spelling
solved
collabration
.
Correct your spelling
collaboration
On the other hand
, one small thing is relative to the biggest issue
. In order to sovle
the biggest, global Correct your spelling
solve
issue
, every single, tiny effort should not underestimated. For example
, raise public enviormental
awareness of how to contributeCorrect your spelling
environmental
a
green Change preposition
to a
environment
by simple
daily movement which needs Add an article
a simple
the simple
govenment
support. Correct your spelling
government
For example
, Correct article usage
the goverment
goverment
can embark on spreading effective methods to reduce environmental pollution for Correct your spelling
government
public
which Add an article
the public
a public
enhance
the public Correct subject-verb agreement
enhances
responsibilities
to dedicate themselves Fix the agreement mistake
responsibility
in
environmental protection.
In conclusion, Change preposition
to
global
Correct article usage
the global
environment
Replace the word
environmental
issue
is the priority to concentrate on by the government, it should not stop any movement on local environmental protection. Only the local environment
improves, the whole world environment
will be increased respectively.Submitted by asllchkied on
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Grammar and Punctuation
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Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words and phrases more effectively to connect your ideas and make your argument flow more smoothly. Words like 'therefore,' 'however,' and 'meanwhile' can help structure your argument logically.
Task Achievement
Support your main points with more specific examples or data. This will make your argument more convincing and show deeper engagement with the topic.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
A clear introduction and conclusion are present, helping to frame the discussion and summarizing key points effectively.
Task Achievement
There is an attempt to address the importance of local efforts in solving global issues, indicating a nuanced understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.