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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that children at secondary school should be streamed, i.e. taught in classes according to ability, rather than being taught in mixed-ability classes. Do you think the advantages of streaming children at secondary school outweigh the disadvantages?

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Grouping
children
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 at the secondary
level
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according to
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ability
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 is favoured by some people over
classes
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 with different
ability
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 levels.
While
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 there may be some advantages to
this
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 approach, I personally think that the drawbacks of streaming outweigh the benefits. The main benefit of streaming is that
pupils
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 of all abilities will benefit from being taught at a pace that suits their
level
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. If,
for example
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,
pupils
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 are struggling with chemistry lessons, the teacher can go at a slower pace and vice versa for higher-
level
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pupils
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. Some people
also
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 argue that
mixed-
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ability
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classes
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 disadvantage students at both extremes of
ability
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, as it is easier to teach a class
that is
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 all of the same
ability
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level
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. From the teacher`s point of view, everything is aimed at the
pupils
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 in the middle-
ability
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 range. Having said that
however
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, I feel that streaming
children
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 at a secondary
level
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 is harmful. The main drawback is that if
children
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 are not taught in
mixed-
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ability
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classes
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, it does not prepare them for the real world they will encounter in the future.
This
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 could
then
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 hold them back and reduce their opportunities considerably.
Moreover
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, it is possible that
children
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 will be labeled wrongly and their potential not realized. Unless there is some competition in the classroom as in
mixed-
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ability
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 classrooms, the
children
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 will not be stretched.
As a result
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,
this
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 can have a negative impact on
children
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`s attitudes to learning and to school in general. In conclusion, there is some view that
children
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 in middle school should be streamed with the same
ability
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 as
children
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 rather than grouping
mixed-
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ability
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classes
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.
While
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 the benefit of
this
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 grouping is easier to teach the same
level
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 of
children
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,
however
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,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think that the
children
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 have more opportunities in the
mixed-
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ability
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classes
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 and it helps them to improve their potential.

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic and presents a clear opinion. However, you could strengthen your argument by providing more specific examples or evidence to support your points. Detailed examples would enhance your task response score.
task achievement
Some of your main points are well-explained, but a few could use more depth. For instance, you mention that children will not be stretched without competition, but expanding on how this impacts their learning could make your argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized and follows a logical structure. However, try to improve transitions between some paragraphs to make your argument flow more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-done. They clearly state your position and summarize your argument. Just ensure the conclusion does not introduce new ideas and reinforces the points discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is clear, concise, and provides a good overview of the essay's main arguments.
coherence cohesion
You have a well-structured essay with a clear beginning, middle, and end. This helps convey your points effectively.
task achievement
Your language is generally fluent and your ideas are mostly clearly expressed.
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