Many people around the world spend the majority of their free time at home watching TV shows. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?
It is known that most
folks
spend their leisure time
watching TV
shows, due to
the modern age we live in, technology has evolved over time
giving us a number of new facilities to use, like watching TV
shows at home, the opportunity that is
ancestors did not have. In this
essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of spending too much of your leisure time
on TV
shows.
Firstly
, numerous people prefer to stay at home to watch television
than go out, as they consider this
activity to be relaxing and comfortable for them, also
folks
affirm watching television
can also
be a way to learn new things. For example
, most of the people who spend their time
on television
confess they learned a number of new facts from documentaries or from cooking shows which helped them to develop new skills.
Secondly
, spending too much time
on TV
shows can lead to diseases or depression, folks
who spend too much of their time
at home forget to socialize with other people, therefore
they lock themselves in their houses forgetting about the real world. For example
, folks
tend to become obsess
with their Change the form of the verb
obsessed
TV
shows as a result
they care less about other healthy, productive activities. All of this
leads to a solidarity life, as the individual can have mental health issues.
In conclusion, spending your leisure time
on television
depends on each person and on what they choose to watch as some TV
shows can be beneficial for the community, while
others are destructive and cause dependence which can destroy the mental health of a human being.Submitted by annaungureanu794 on
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task achievement
Consider starting your essays with a more concise and clear thesis statement that summarizes the main points you will discuss. This can help guide the reader and ensure that your essay stays focused.
task achievement
Try to develop your points more fully and provide more detail in your examples. This will help to strengthen your arguments and provide more concrete evidence for your claims.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between your ideas. Use transitional phrases and linking words more effectively to guide the reader through your key points.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively sets up the topic and provides background information, which helps to engage the reader.
complete response
You present both advantages and disadvantages clearly, showing a balanced view of the topic.
clear comprehensive ideas
You made relevant points about how TV shows can be educational as well as detrimental to social interaction and health, which are pertinent to the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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