IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many major cities are facing a housing crisis as they cannot provide enough land for new buildings. Some local governments believe the problem could be solved by reassigning park land for residential development, because this land would be better used for housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, many big cities are suffering
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from
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housing problems. They cannot provide enough space for new
houses
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. Some governments think that to tackle
this
Linking Words
 problem, They should reassign
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park land
Correct your spelling
parkland
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 for residential progress because
this
Linking Words
Use synonyms
park land
Correct your spelling
parkland
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 might be better for new buildings. I agree with that because
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park
Correct your spelling
parklands
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lands
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 have more green and most of them are located in central
areas
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. Parklands have more foliages than other parts of the city. If people want to make new homes or buildings they should make it greenery to tackle air pollution and
also
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 improve people's lives.
For instance
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, If they want to make homes in to
countryside
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 most of the places in the
countryside
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 are arid
lands
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. They cannot make everywhere green.
However
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, If they decide to make these
houses
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 in
park
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areas
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. They do not have to make everywhere green they can plant some trees and bushes.
Hence
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, building
houses
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 in
park
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areas
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 will make it easier for people to make it green and these green places improve the quality of air.
Furthermore
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,
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Park
Correct your spelling
Parklands
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lands
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 are mostly located in central
areas
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.
This
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 location may be an advantage for workers.
For example
Linking Words
, If their workplaces are located in central
areas
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, making their home
to
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in
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 the
countryside
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 is not a good solution for them because they may have an issue with transportation.
Nevertheless
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,
Due to
Linking Words
 the
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park
Correct your spelling
parklands
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lands
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 location in the city centre, individuals can
went
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go
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 their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
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 easier and cheaper than
countryside
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 hosts.
To sum up
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, Some local governments believe that
park
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areas
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 should be reassigned for housing. I agree with that suggestion because making these
houses
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 for
park
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areas
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 may improve air quality
due to
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 greens and
also
Linking Words
 workers want their homes located in central places because they do not want to make their transportation harder.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear, single main idea to enhance readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to punctuation, particularly consistent use of commas and periods to clarify your sentences.
task achievement
Clarify how the advantages of building on park land outweigh the possible disadvantages to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Include more specific and relevant examples to reinforce your main points.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a clear structure with introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
Your main argument is articulated clearly and consistently throughout the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • housing crisis
  • residential development
  • reassigning park land
  • green spaces
  • recreational activities
  • mental well-being
  • ecological balance
  • environmental consequences
  • supporting biodiversity
  • high-rise apartments
  • vacant lots
  • repurposing industrial areas
  • community opposition
  • social unrest
  • quality of life
  • urban planning
  • sustainable development
  • integrating green spaces
  • preservation
  • communal spaces
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