Creative artists should always be given freedom to express their own ideas (in words, pictures, music or film) in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree on this IELTS topic?

In
this
modernized world, some people argue that creative
artists
should be given the freedom to express their own ideas in whichever way they wish, without any
government
restrictions.
However
, I would say that I agree that the
government
's intervention should be enforced for some reasons which are set out below.
Firstly
, creative
artists
express their ideas in mainly words, pictures, music, or films. Many famous directors, authors, photographers, and they create entertaining and positive
art
.
However
, there are some cases where they may create
art
which does not follow a
country
's policies.
For instance
, using songs to shame other countries or regions is an example of a case where the
government
's intervention is needed to ensure the created content will not violate any regulation or policy. Other instances may be when
artists
create
art
that destroys public properties;
for example
, doing graffiti
art
under bridges, local buildings, and public property will cause a feeling of discomfort for citizens.
On the other hand
,
government
restrictions may benefit the
artists
. Take
for instance
, having patent rights to their
art
will ensure that their
art
will not be copied by others. Other cases can include when they get international recognition, many countries try to reach out to them to promote their
country
,
thus
making them known to others. Photographers and content creators are a great example of
this
, they are hired to shoot photos and videos of the beautiful scenery of a
country
, which can be used to advertise the
country
, used in local news media, and as references for
government
-issued websites.
To conclude
,
government
restrictions should be implemented to track and monitor creative
artists
and support them by using patent rights and promotions.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task effectively; however, you could benefit from expanding on your ideas with more detailed examples and comprehensive arguments. This would make your points clearer and more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph flows logically to the next, and use more linking words and phrases to ensure a seamless transition between ideas. This will enhance the overall coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and well-structured introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to support your argument, especially in relation to government restrictions and how they can benefit artists.
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