Sample Question 01 (Discuss both views) : In many countries, young adults are engaged in some kinds of work. Some people regard this as completely wrong. Others consider it as a valuable experience, important for learning and taking responsibilities. Discuss both views.

Over the past few decades, we have witnessed a remarkable tendency among young
adults
to engage in paid or unpaid
work
.
While
some argue that
this
trend imposes undue pressure on youth, others view it creates a great opportunity to discover practical challenges they will face in their lives at some point. From my perspective, early
work
experiences offer invaluable chances to gain practical skills and develop a strong sense of responsibility. On the one hand, some individuals claim that young
adults
involved in duties outside of their primary educational activities are prone to developing depression-related illnesses
such
as anxiety.
Therefore
, they argue that the government should fund young
adults
' education if financial constraints necessitate their employment.
For instance
, recent surveys indicate that some high schools and universities offer temporary loan programs to help students cover tuition fees without excessive financial burden.
This
enables students to focus on their studies without undue stress.
This
trend suggests that gaining
work
experience
after completing formal education is increasingly valued by young
adults
.
On the other hand
, many people in modern society, including parents, strongly believe in the benefits of young
adults
gaining
work
experience
alongside their studies.
This
is because they primarily emphasize the experiential learning opportunities that young people can gain from their roles. They view these experiences as valuable investments in their future.
For example
, research indicates that many successful individuals,
such
as Steve Jobs and Bill Gates, attribute their achievements to the knowledge and
experience
gained from their early
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
show examples
.
Consequently
, evidence suggests that early
work
experience
contributes significantly to the development of valuable life skills. In conclusion, Even though some contend that early employment hinders young people's academic development and creates additional stress, I believe it offers invaluable opportunities for growth and learning.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has one clear central idea. While the essay is generally well-structured, some points could be more clearly delineated to enhance readability.
task achievement
Expand on the conclusion to reinforce the main points discussed in the essay and to provide a sense of closure.
task achievement
Provide a more balanced analysis by discussing potential counterarguments more thoroughly. This could strengthen the discussion of how early work experiences might negatively impact young adults.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear and effective introduction that sets the stage for the discussion.
logical structure
Logical progression of ideas is generally well-maintained. Each point builds on the previous one, contributing to overall coherence.
relevant specific examples
Good use of relevant examples, such as referencing well-known figures like Steve Jobs and Bill Gates, enhances the argument.
introduction conclusion present
Effective conclusion that summarizes the main views discussed in the essay.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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