Music is considered to be a way to connect people from different cultures and ages. Do you agree or disagree?

In today's world, I completely agree that
music
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is a powerful way to connect
people
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across different cultures and age groups. Tune has a unique ability to bring individuals together, even when they do not share the same language, background, or generation.
To begin
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with, many
people
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argue that younger generations do not socialise as actively as older generations once did.
While
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this
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may be true to some extent, the tune provides a shared space where both old and young can interact.
For example
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, concerts, festivals, and community events often attract diverse age groups who enjoy the same songs or artists, helping to bridge the generational gap.
Additionally
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,
although
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some
people
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believe online platforms weaken social connections, melody often strengthens them
instead
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. Individuals can share playlists, participate in global fan communities, and collaborate on
music
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projects through the internet. These interactions help
people
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bond despite physical distance.
Furthermore
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, modern city life can be unsafe
due to
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issues
such
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as increased air pollution or concerns about crime, leading many parents to discourage their children from spending time outside.
However
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,
music
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still enables connection within safe environments,
such
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as homes, schools, cultural centres, or online spaces. Society can participate in virtual concerts or create
music
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together digitally, allowing social interaction without physical risks. Suffice it to say,
music
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remains one of the most universal tools for creating meaningful connections, overcoming cultural, generational, and geographical barriers.

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Task Response
Your view is clear and you stay with it. To push the score up, give more strong facts or small true life examples that show how music helps people from different ages and cultures talk and work together.
Coherence and Cohesion
Link ideas with easy, short words and clear links. Break long sentences into two parts. Use phrases like 'for example', 'also', 'in addition' to connect ideas smoothly.
Strength
Clear view on the topic and steady stance.
Strength
Good examples that fit the idea.
Strength
Paragraphs show a plan and good order.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay โ€“ it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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