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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below gives information from a 2008 report about consumption of energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information from a 2008 report about consumption of energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graph illustrates the data about US
energy
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 (
petrol
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 and
oil
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, coal, natural gas, nuclear, solar/
wind
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, and
hydropower
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) consumption from 1980 until its projection in 2030.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest consumed
energy
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 is
petrol
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 and
oil
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, whether in the past or in the
future
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. In 1980,
petrol
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 and
oil
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 were the leading
energy
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 with 35
quadrillion
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units
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 consumed in a year. Its
units
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 went down slightly in 1985 and 1995 but
then
Linking Words
 peaked in 2005. Following
petrol
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 and
oil
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, natural gas was the second most applied fuel with 20
quadrillion
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units
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 spent in 1980.
However
Linking Words
, its position was replaced by coal
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 rose up in 1995. The rest of the fuels
such
Linking Words
 as nuclear, solar/
wind
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, and
hydropower
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 were nearly invincible in 1980. As per the forecast for 2030,
petrol
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 and
oil
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 still win the biggest
units
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 to consume. The number increases to approximately 50
quadrillion
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units
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 for
future
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 use. Second is coal, the amount has risen massively since 2020, to nearly 30
quadrillion
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units
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 in 2030. The third is natural gas which has been stagnant since 2015, the
units
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 applied not so
difference
Replace the word
different
show examples
 since
then
Linking Words
 at close to 25
quadrillion
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units
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.
Whereas
Linking Words
 nuclear, solar/
wind
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
hydropower
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 have become more noticeable in 2030. It will be more common to use them but not in a great amount, only less than 10
quadrillion
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units
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. In conclusion, the line graph shows the variety of fuels that the US consumed over history and its
future
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 estimation.
Petrol
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 and
oil
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 were the leading fuel in the past and will still be surging in
future
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 consumption. On that note, nuclear, solar/
wind
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, and
hydropower
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energy
Use synonyms
 will gain more attention in the
future
Use synonyms
.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, petrol, oil, wind, hydropower, future, quadrillion, units with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • depicts
  • trend
  • consumption
  • projections
  • slow growth
  • advancements
  • efficiency
  • acceleration
  • underscoring
  • expanding economy
  • household demands
  • trajectory
  • technological advancements
  • population growth
  • standards of living
  • renewable energy
  • fossil fuels
  • sustainable energy policies
  • environmental impacts
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