IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows home heating fuel choice to the year the house was built .

The graph below shows home heating fuel choice to the year the house was built .
The line graphs illustrate the information about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
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 choosing
electricity
Use synonyms
 and natural
gas
Use synonyms
 for their heating fuel options based on the obstructive
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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 from before 1950 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the proportion of natural
gas
Use synonyms
 was more used before 1950
whereas
Linking Words
 the percentage of
electricity
Use synonyms
 started lower and
then
Linking Words
 steadily increased reaching the same level after 1990. To be more specific, beginning from the usage of
elctric
Correct your spelling
electric
electrical
 energy was lower than natural
gas
Use synonyms
 which accounted for 60% or four
time
Change to a plural noun
times
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 higher,
however
Linking Words
, there was an upward tendency with a gradual
rose
Correct your spelling
rise
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 in the percentage of
electricity
Use synonyms
 with
Correct article usage
an increased
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increased
Replace the word
increase
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10
Change preposition
of 10
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% each decade year. In comparison, the proportion of fuel
starting
Wrong verb form
started
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 from 60% and stayed at the same level during 10 year period from 1950 to 1969.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, a sudden decline in natural
gas
Use synonyms
 took place from 1970 to 1989, leading the figure to drop to 45%, it is
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 that the gap between fuel and
electricity
Use synonyms
 was narrowed to 10%, compared to
electricity
Use synonyms
 made up 35%. Eventually, the usage of
gas
Use synonyms
 reached the plateau in the next decade, sharing an identical figure with
electricity
Use synonyms
 at 45%
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of the given period.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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