It is a good idea for people to continue working in their old age, if it possible for them to do so. Do you agree or disagree?

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In the modern day, older

people

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tend to

work

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, if it is within their power in

this

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age

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. I personally agree with

this

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view that elderly individuals keep working could support them both financially and health-wise even though living alone or with children.

Firstly

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, elderly

people

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who have reached retirement

age

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still want to devote themselves to operating for family, society, and so on, to suit their condition of well-being and ability. In their old

age

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, physical and mental health is a priority issue to take care of . When they

work

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in companies, the majority of the jobs they do are related to actions using their hands and feet rather than using their minds. Older

people

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have more benefits in improving health than younger generations, increasing endurance and preventing several disorders of the bones and joints

such

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as back pain, and aches,…

For example

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, a variety of doctors advise older

people

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should find a job or take part in an outdoor activity that will assist in raising their well-being rather than staying at

home

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Thus

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, various older individuals prefer freedom a life not dependent on children’s provides. Having own thoughts and plans in each person’s retirement. They would like to pay for spending and purchase their favourite items without having to use their offspring’s money;

also

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give their children pocket money which is

also

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what they want.

This

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is because their psychology has a negative side in expenditure. Numerous of them worried about their kid’s lack of money and hardship when going to

work

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Similarly

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, seniors need to expand their relationship which is

also

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an essential problem

that is

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able to benefit from when heading to

work

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While

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home

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, limit their relationships with those around them, just having their family.

This

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leads to them feeling alone and sad when their children missing from

home

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However

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, when they contact more colleagues in their fields and factories, they can make friends easily and

also

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keep connected with them for a long time even though they cannot function and stay at

home

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Hence

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, they

also

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shine examples for youngsters to follow and learn.

For instance

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, elderly

people

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who are still working in companies always have more friends the same

age

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around them

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apply

show examples

and

also

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have more young generations studying from their methods. In conclusion, I do believe that working brings more advantages for elderly individuals in more aspects

such

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as connection, wellness, and outlay of funds.

phamnhung275Wed Jul 31 2024

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clear comprehensive ideas

Try to elaborate more on your supporting points with clearer and more structured arguments. This will enhance the overall clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas.

logical structure

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences in that paragraph contribute to this idea. This will help improve the logical structure of your essay.

relevant specific examples

Use more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and relevant.

introduction conclusion present

You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay well.

complete response

You have addressed the task effectively, presenting a clear position and supporting it with reasons and examples.

supported main points

Your essay introduces relevant points and examples that generally support your main ideas.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

405 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cognitive decline
Mental and emotional well-being
Social interaction
Financial stability
Sense of purpose
Self-worth
Physical health
Skill utilization
Experience
Flexible working hours
Generational gap
Elderly individuals
Retirement
Workplace
Economic contribution

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It is a good idea for people to continue working in their old age, if it possible for them to do so. Do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

in some countries,more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exersice classses what are the reasons for this? is this a positive or negative development?

Ordinary people try to copy famous personalities by seeing them on TV and reading them on newspaper. What is the reason? Is it a good or bad idea.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this .

Nowadays in many countries chemicals are used to preserve food. Do the advantages of this use outweigh the disadvantages ?