Nowadays it is common for people to get married and have children in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Do you agree or disagree that this trend will benefit society?
These days, troubled married life. Many times, these
people
choose
to become single for a longer period of their Wrong verb form
choosing
life
has become ubiquitous. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
As a result
, they will have children
lately like in their thirties. Some people
see this
trend as positive whereas
others hold the opposite opinions. According to
my opinion, late marriages
create mature partners
and financially stable parents. These are vital benefits for society
. This
essay will depict my agreement with relevant examples.
Maturity is considered the paramount quality of marriage. When partners
are matured
enough, they understand each other and do not indulge in fighting Replace the word
mature
for
petty issues. Change preposition
over
As a result
, there will be fewer domestic violence and divorce cases in society
. For instance
, the state of Kerala has a significantly higher rate of happily married couples because most of the marriages
have happened in the thirties of their partners
.
Additionally
, It is generally seen that the income of a person increases as he grows older. A partner with financial stability will keep his counterpart happy and secure a bright future for his children
. He can provide higher education to his children
, these children
will earn more in future which will ultimately make society
stronger and prosperous. In particular
, a recent survey by a private NGO says that people
who are at
higher positions in government jobs or in MNCs had educated and well-earned parents.
Change preposition
in
On the other hand
, when a partner is immature due to
his age factor, he will not be able to understand the emotions of his counterpart and will end up havingCorrect article usage
a
marriages
do not last
long and create sad
life for both Correct article usage
a sad
partners
. For example
, the
divorced Correct article usage
apply
people
of
the USA have more depression issues than Change preposition
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
of
the rest Change preposition
in
countries
of the world.
In conclusion, the idea of late Change preposition
of countries
marriages
have
benefits Correct subject-verb agreement
has
such
as creating strong bonds, financial freedom and avoiding chances of divorce due to
immaturity. Therefore
, it should be adopted. Hence
, I agree that they are beneficial for society
.Submitted by chandralekha1993 on
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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic and includes relevant examples, but it could benefit from more nuanced argumentation. Consider discussing potential drawbacks of late marriages to show a balanced view.
task achievement
Some of your points could be better supported with more specific examples or data. For instance, when discussing financial stability, you might want to include more factual statistics or studies.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. You might use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and that the idea is developed fully. As it stands, some points feel a bit rushed and not deeply explored.
coherence cohesion
Revise minor grammatical errors and awkward phrases to bolster clarity and coherence in your writing. For instance, 'he can provide higher education to his children, these children will earn more' would be clearer as 'he can provide higher education to his children, which will enable them to earn more in the future.'
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly outlines the essay's main argument and prepares the reader for what follows.
supported main points
You have provided relevant examples to support your argument, which strengthens your essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates your stance, which ties the essay together well.