Some people think that children should be homeschooled when they are very young whioe others think it is better for them to attend a kindergarten. Which do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

provides an instrumental instrument in cognitive development, which not only stimulates literacy but
also
trains numeracy. It will introduce a tailored curriculum that can be utilized in learning activities. Let's say,
this
approach tends to facilitate toddler's learning to broaden their horizons in terms of critical thinking and problem-solving.
Consequently
,
this
situation has people get up to a pre-primary school
due to
being able to boost fundamental academic skills.
To sum up
, it is noticeable that if the parents are entirely involved in a formal institution,
there
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
two positive sides will come up.
Additionally
, in my point of view, I individually agree that those situations will be unavoidable after application.
Submitted by soniandriawan1992 on

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task achievement
Try to fully develop your arguments to complete your response. Add specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, mention specific activities or curriculum aspects in homeschooling and kindergarten.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing the logical flow of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph logically connects to the next. Use appropriate transitions between ideas.
task achievement
You have included a conclusion, which helps to summarize your arguments.
task achievement
Your essay touched upon various aspects of the topic, such as cognitive development and fundamental academic skills.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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