The internet has brought about many changes into our day to day life. Nowadays we are doing things such as mailing, communication much faster. Do these developments have more advantages than disadvantages?

Internet
has made significant changes in
out
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our
show examples
daily lives. In
the
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apply
show examples
recent years, these
development
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developments
show examples
has
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have
show examples
made
out
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apply
show examples
our
coommunication
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communication
communications
faster and more efficient.
Although
internet
advancement has numerous advantages,
but
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apply
show examples
it has its own
disadvantages
which cannot be neglected.
This
essay will explore the benefits and drawbacks of
internet
advancement and explain how the advantages outweigh its
disadvantages
with reasoned examples.
To begin
with,
internet
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the internet
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comes with many advantages
such
as improved communication, ease
in
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of
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information
accessiblity
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accessibility
, and social connectivity. Primarily, The
internet
connect
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connects
show examples
everyone globally through its
its
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apply
show examples
imporved
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improved
communication and ease in
speed
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the speed
show examples
of communication with instant messaging, video calls and virtual meetings.
Similarly
,
it's
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its
show examples
social connectivity has connected distant family and friends
as well as
new
people
in the world.
For instance
, where businessmen and general thousand of
dollors
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dollars
used to spend
thousand
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thousands
show examples
of
dollors
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dollars
, now
people
can meet anyone from anywhere.
Secondly
, on
one
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the one
show examples
hand
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hand,
show examples
this
ease
in
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of
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accessing information through
internet
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the internet
show examples
has made
people
to
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apply
show examples
gain information,
reasearch
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research
news and DIY tutorials,
while
on
other
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the other
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this
has become an
education
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educational
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opportunity for
student
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students
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accessing
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to access
show examples
countless online courses and
education
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educational
show examples
resources.
Moreover
, with the connectivity gained through
internet
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the internet
show examples
student can target their ideal opportunity from anywhere and work on their professional development.
However
, despite its numerous benefits some of its
disadvantages
have made
people
vulnerable from using it. To illustrate, several studies conducted globally
has
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have
show examples
revealed digital
addcition
Correct your spelling
addiction
, making
people
lose their sense of responsibility towards their family and their personal growth.
Additionally
, digital hacking
have
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has
show examples
made many lose their entire wealth on
internet
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the internet
show examples
. Not to deny, but
its
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it
show examples
also
divides
people
with inequality in accessing the
internet
. These were some of the most significant
disadvantages
which are needed
Wrong verb form
that need
show examples
to be considered. In conclusion,
while
the
internet
offers numerous benefits for users of all ages, including educational resources for students and the ability to connect
people
globally, it
also
presents challenges. Many individuals distrust the
internet
due to
a lack of knowledge and fear of financial loss. To address these
disadvantages
, the government should implement initiatives
such
as awareness campaigns to educate
people
on how to protect themselves online.
Submitted by nick on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, consider making the transitions between paragraphs smoother. This helps the essay flow better and makes it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Although you have a good number of relevant points, make sure each point is supported by a strong, specific example. This can help strengthen your argument and provide evidence for your claims.
task achievement
Try to minimize grammatical errors and typos to improve clarity and professionalism. For example, 'out' should be 'our', and 'addcition' should be 'addiction'.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which adds structure to the argument.
task achievement
The main points are clearly stated and relevant to the topic, which shows a good understanding of the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instant messaging
  • video calls
  • virtual meetings
  • access to information
  • online banking
  • e-commerce
  • educational resources
  • digital addiction
  • privacy concerns
  • digital divide
  • social media platforms
  • remote work
  • telecommuting
  • cybersecurity
  • streaming services
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