Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Not everything in the universe is made equal. Since the beginning of time, there have always been substantial differences among nations; one of which is “general income”. Special policies on how to spend and govern the produced money have led to what we now know as wealthy vs poor countries. Arguably, wealth is the most advantageous resource one could possess. Leading to
overall
more convenient access to primary needs among which; food and education seem to be more important. Wealthier communities provide far better education and healthier foods. Generally, the right to acquire healthy food and appropriate education seems to be mostly a matter of human rights: They should be accessible to everyone regardless of geographical location. Based on
this
notion, it might seem like a good idea to hold wealthier countries accountable for sharing the burden of providing similar services in less well-off locations. But why should certain nations be held accountable for the lack of food and educational opportunities in others?
Such
an action might worsen the lower-income governments’ failures to provide well-thought, sustainable plans for meeting their citizens’ basic needs; making them rely entirely on external backing. A potentially better solution is helping those who have already done their job tackling the issue. Providing them with a reasonable, helpful found collected under the supervision of a higher, international organization.
This
approach, if done well; could be the most helpful solution. In conclusion, dividing the burden with correspondence to the primary situation of the nation seeking help, and providing help only after the said government has done its assigned role; ensures their responsibility
while
providing the much-needed help.
Submitted by anahitakhosravi4 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to strengthen your argument by adding more specific examples or case studies to support your points. This will make your essay more persuasive and engaging.
coherence cohesion
Work on making your transitions between paragraphs smoother. This will help improve the flow of your essay and make it easier for the reader to follow your line of reasoning.
coherence cohesion
Be careful with punctuation to ensure clarity. For example, the use of semicolons could be revisited as some are not used correctly.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are very well-crafted, giving a clear start and finish to your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have a logical structure and well-developed arguments, making your essay easy to follow.
task achievement
You provide a balanced viewpoint addressing both sides of the argument, which enriches your task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • interconnected
  • global stability
  • economic self-sufficiency
  • sustainable development
  • capacity-building
  • foreign aid
  • mutual benefits
  • trade relations
  • long-term outcomes
  • dependency
  • moral obligation
  • alleviate poverty
  • humanitarian assistance
  • resource allocation
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!